Are you in the "Talking Stage", or are you a Free Therapist?

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Single ladies, or ladies who remember their single life.

Talking Therapy disguised as the 'Talking Stage'

Have you noticed how many men, like to talk about themselves non-stop? And then they praise you for listening, when all you've done is sit there, wondering why he doesn't ask questions. Most bizarre of all, the more you sit there and let them talk and talk, and talk, they start announcing that they really like you, but of course, are unable to say what they like about you, as they have never asked questions.

The truth is, they like having free therapy, hours and hours of your time, sucked up into listening to a man off-load his day on you. Don't accept it.

Watch out for this behaviour.

 

[𝕃𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕙]

I am guilty of doing this

 

[OreoMcflurry]

I am guilty of doing this

Sxb what does it feel like to finally have a wife and baby you could call “aabo”

 

[𝕃𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕙]

Sxb what does it feel like to finally have a wife and baby you could call “aabo”

No idea im an 18 yo troll why u asking?

 

[OreoMcflurry]

No idea im an 18 yo troll why u asking?

Waleee ma saas baa…

I may have mistaken you for adeersyber.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

I am guilty of doing this

You're only 18, and the first step to dealing with an issue is recognising it. Learn to be generous in conversations by listening and asking questions. It will help you become successful in all aspects of life, not just romantically.

 

[𝕃𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕋𝕙𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕙]

Waleee ma saas baa…

I may have mistaken you for adeersyber.

Sxb i change personas every week. Next week i'm a lesbian xalima this week im khaemwaset's twin

 

[Ladylike]

That’s why there is a block button. I just blocked a guy he asked for my snap then insisted that I video chat there even after politely saying no multiple times i immediately hanged up on him then block him. That gave me rapist vibe. What type no can you not understand?

 

[Sophisticate]

I think they call this emotional dumping. It is not uncommon for people to serve the role of defacto shrink, even as friends, though this can certainly extend to the getting-to-know-you process or even a spouse. Some men do this more than women because they do not have a solid group of friends to discuss serious matters. Or may not feel comfortable doing so. This may occur without a strong support system of friends and perhaps due to not being as emotionally developed. There is also a fine line between healthy venting and emotional flooding/overload. No matter what, it's important to have boundaries and assert that you don't double up as a shrink, though if they want a referral to other services, you may be inclined to provide a redirect.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

I think they call this emotional dumping. It is not uncommon for people to serve the role of defacto shrink, even as friends, though this can certainly extend to the getting-to-know-you process or even a spouse. Some men do this more than women because they do not have a solid group of friends to discuss serious matters. Or may not feel comfortable doing so. This may occur without a strong support system of friends and perhaps due to not being as emotionally developed. There is also a fine line between healthy venting and emotional flooding/overload. No matter what, it's important to have boundaries and assert that you don't double up as a shrink, though if they want a referral to other services, you may be inclined to provide a redirect.

It's obvious a lot of men are deeply lonely and they only have superficial friendships with men, so when they see a woman, who is silent (and baffled), they think they can talk non-stop. If they learn to listen and share at the same time, at least it will be mutual therapy.

 

[Sophisticate]

It's obvious a lot of men are deeply lonely and they only have superficial friendships with men, so when they see a woman, who is silent (and baffled), they think they can talk non-stop. If they learn to listen and share at the same time, at least it will be mutual therapy.

Due to gendered socialization, women are pressured to do the bulk of emotional labour, be self-sacrificing, patient and highly attuned. However, that would get old with one-sided effort. The sad thing is that women often carry the slack in relationships because men tend to have more superficial same-sex friendships and may not have an emotionally deep connection with them, favouring surface-level discussions and shared activities instead. However, with women, be it friends or something more, they may let their guard down and show a different side of themselves than with their boys. Nothing wrong with that. However, the issue is when there is a lack of reciprocity. Such interactions can leave you exhausted/burnt out.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Due to gendered socialization, women are pressured to do the bulk of emotional labour, be self-sacrificing, patient and highly attuned. However, that would get old with one-sided effort. The sad thing is that women often carry the slack in relationships because men tend to have more superficial same-sex friendships and may not have an emotionally deep connection with them, favouring surface-level discussions and shared activities instead. However, with women, be it friends or something more, they may let their guard down and show a different side of themselves than with their boys. Nothing wrong with that. However, the issue is when there is a lack of reciprocity. Such interactions can leave you exhausted/burnt out.

A lot of these negative male traits can be boiled down to 'self-involved/selfish'. ME, ME, MEEEEEE

And they have the nerve to blame women for the 'male loneliness epidemic'.

 

[mrlog]

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[Yaraye]

I also do this shit

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

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If guys are 'more real', why is it that men are suffering from 'loneliness epidemic', where are their boys?

 

[Internet Nomad]

A woman should be seen not heard.

Any guy if you ask him they ultimately do not care what a woman says. There contributions are never significant. Infact they are barely humans as the science shows.

A good woman should be trained from young to be submissive and should only stick out when spoken to for the rest of the day she should be in the background like an amenity like a remote or dishwasher.

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[The alchemist]

All we've heard from women since we arrived in the West is that men don't talk about their feelings enough. Now it is too much?

This is why people say, "Women don't know what they want."

 

[The alchemist]

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Saying men have more superficial friendships is a joke. It exposes how a lot of women don't know shit about dudes.

Men don't bond with other people like women, but it does not mean we're deprived of deep bonds. We're not behaviorally the same, and our needs are different. To essentialize their argument, men are unlike women, entailing a fundamental lack because these women view everything as relative to themselves. The flaw is that they're the center of reference to begin with. It's silly.

 

[Sophisticate]

I remember reading that men tend to flourish more than women in intimate relationships, while women report greater levels of relationship dissatisfaction. Anyone can have self-centred traits. However, on average, men suffer more from mild/sub-clinical alexithymia - a deficit in cognitive and affective processing of emotions expressed through an inability to put emotions into words. Rather, women are expected to understand and discern their feelings, desires and intentions and those of others, interpreting their gestures and trying to gather this from minimal communicative expressions or avoidance behaviours, hence serving the role of de facto therapist, especially in intimate relationships. A duty their male friends are not required to engage in. Men certainly have a friendship recession with fewer friends than women and greater loneliness. They are less likely to initiate hangouts with friends and don't do much to sustain or maintain friendships relative to their female counterparts, especially as they age and leave post-secondary for the workforce after marrying/getting into long-term relationships or having kids. Not to say this is all men, but a gender disparity certainly exists.

 

[mrlog]

If guys are 'more real', why is it that men are suffering from 'loneliness epidemic', where are their boys?

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