Love Vs. Pragmatism

[Haze]

Recently I saw an interesting thread on another site that brought up a question i've struggled with for sometime. The question comes with some back ground information so please bear with me.

Throughout my life i've been told that love is powerful thing, and that if i'm not careful it could blind me, so much so that i lose touch with reality. I've never been truly in love, so i can't say for certain how much truth there is to it this. But i've heard it said that because of this you shouldn't marry a person you truly love because love fades and when it does you'll be stuck with someone you've now become completely disillusioned with. Whereas if you look around, you can and should be able find someone who is pragmatic, who can cover your weaknesses while supporting you, and all the while is capable of maintaining a healthy relationship that is built for longevity. The only catch being that they aren't and will never be the person your hearts most yearns for.

So with that being said i'd love to see what your takes on this are. Should you marry the person you most love, and take the chance of falling out of love with them eventually and being in a bad relationship? Or would you rather opt for security and chose to be with someone who isn't the person you love most, but they understand you well enough that you know feel secure in your investment, even though you might be being unfair to them since your heart's not all the way in it?

 

[Siddhartha]

Everyone should experience love atleast once

 

[Geeljire]

Many argue that falling inlove is a function of your values. Meaning who you fall inlove with mirrors yourself and you do not fall in love with someone who contradicts your values.

Therefore i would like to think that Love and Pragmatism should go hand in hand and is determined by your own value formation.

 

[Lostbox]

I wouldn't care if I was in love or not but more if they fulfill their side of the deal.

 

[Haze]

I gotta say for my part that it's a strange and difficult thing to speak about. I want to find someone i love with all my heart and have her with me for all days i live from the moment i meet her. But i also know that our love may not stand the test of time. So the question of is it better to have loved and lost or to never have loved at all is ultimately what this comes down to for me. I still don't know though. But it looks like most of you are willing to go with the pragmatic lifestyle over the passionate one. I didn't think somali's were a people heavy on love, but then again it's weird that i thought otherwise as most somali couples aren't necessarily the lovey dovey kind. Least of all when most of their communication comes in the ways of grunts and shouts at one another and the infamous, "Naheeyde, shaxaa iikeen."

 

[AceofSom]

Deep! ... pass what ever your smoking sxb

 

[Haze]

Deep! ... pass what ever your smoking sxb

^Lol, yeah. I wish i could say anything that goes against this, but most somali love stories i hear about end up in the Bodari and Cahaaqisha category. Which is to say, it's a tragedy of shakespearean proportions.

 

[AceofSom]

^Lol, yeah. I wish i could say anything that goes against this, but most somali love stories i hear about end up in the Bodari and Cahaaqisha category. Which is to say, it's a tragedy of shakespearean proportions.

The concept of love is poorly understood in somali culture.

 

[Haze]

The concept of love is poorly understood in somali culture.

^I gotta ask then why it's so prevalent. Over half of the somali songs that i've heard over my entire life have been love songs. So my perception from those is that Somali's are a romantic people. But then you see how they react to one another, and it the complete f****** opposite! I'm like

 

[Geeljire]

The concept of love is different for every culture and how they choose to express it. I am not much of an expert in ''love'' oriented subjects and how it relates in Somali culture but for what i know from comparison.

The western philosophy is ''You marry who you love'' while in the Somali philosophy is ''You love who you marry''. So like i said many Somalis may think that love and pragmatism go together.