As some modernised Halimos claim to hate Faraxs, could be the lack of emotional capacity Halimos need. From a psychological perspective Somali men have had the hardest life of three decades of war, economic, political, emigration & personal crisis. They have been on survival mode all their life thus, robbed off the emotional growth stage of life. It's a trauma response from both genders to believe they can't date, or romantic enough. Speak to me. What do u think?
Are Somali men emotionally impaired?
- Thread starter Dansal
- Start date
Everything you said is spot on! We’re lowkey broken people with a broken community. I can only imagine what Somalis in Somalia feel SubhnAllah. My Heart goes out to them
But as a Djiboutian idk why our rate of divorce and father abandoning his family is so high when we didn’t go through a civil war like you guys. Maybe Somali men were always misogynistic? Idk at this point everything applies to us right now so idkThank u sis for sharing that. To add, Somali men are also put the sole responsibility of providing the finances for an extended family. Often overlooking his emotional & mental wellbeing. Ends boiling to abusing & mistreating the wife. I guess it goes two ways perhaps. Sure, hurt people hurt people.
I agree! Never thought of that. I know for sure that Somalis in Somalia and Kenya the men are hard workers from what I’ve seen on the other hand Djiboutian aren’t idk…. That’s my observation. I hope things get better for us Somalis inshAllah
Inshallah all will workout soon but it needs we put in efforts & make the conscious decision to build up & be proud of the challenges we've gone throu, as only after difficulty comes ease. Well said, thanks for ur contribution!
The thing you said about romance, I think a lot of the Somali men and women are unable to be sentimental and affectionate with one another or maybe that's just what I've witnessed? I've seen them playfully insult/tease each other or flirt in a suggestive way but never anything lovey dovey.
I have never seen it loool what’s sad is I have never seen a healthy relationship. I just need to make dua and ask Allah to bless me with a healthy relationship because idk what it looks like… I think showing affection is look down
Can't remember ever seeing my parents even hug. I think it's probably just seen as haram by Somalis to show affection which is a shame since I want to be cuddly if I ever get married. I'm not one for PDA but in the comfort of my home, I'd want to show my husband affection. Too bad a lot of Somalis see it as taboo and "gaal"-like.
I know I want to be cuddly, feminine, and danty with my future husband. May Allah bless us with good husbands ameen
Psychologist
Changemaker
Somali culture needs an update, people are still living in 411 while the world is moving in good path. I don't know about the war but it surely does play a role on people lives. but most people here weren't affect by the world, most of them grow up in the west but somehow are brain dead.
Prolly some of them were abuse but they need to understand that no one will help them expect themselves, they are even shy to go see a psychiatrist or seek any help.
Prolly some of them were abuse but they need to understand that no one will help them expect themselves, they are even shy to go see a psychiatrist or seek any help.
I have successfully internalized my emotional trauma, like all real men do.
To all the xalimos talking about cuddling, buy a care bear or something
To all the xalimos talking about cuddling, buy a care bear or something
Good path? Europeans want you extinct so they can take over the continent.
Why does everything you post have to do with Somali men being misogynistic, you're here generalizing us, go outside you house nigga. There's more hate on Somali men than what I see with Xalimos.Everything you said is spot on! We’re lowkey broken people with a broken community. I can only imagine what Somalis in Somalia feel SubhnAllah. My Heart goes out to them
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There are many Somali couples on YouTube .my favorite ones stopped uploading ,but there are still many others
Me too I love that couple allahumma barik! I found them a couple of months ago… they seem like they are very compatible. Also, as a reference to what I wrote I meant irl.
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Listen, all am doing is stating facts we can all agree that 85% ( am being very generous) of Somali father have abandoned their responsibilities and have caused the destruction of our community by producing broken children in the west. Instead of catching feelings and accusing me of insulting Somali men 24/7 how about you be the change and admit there’s a problem. Correcg a Somali men if you see that type of behaviour. Unfortunately our community protects them and normalizes this behaviour ( because I never see Somali men discussing the high rates of Somali men abandoning his family and/ or stigmatizing that type of behaviour.) the truth hurts and that’s why Somali women my age dread the thought of marriage and see abdis as a liability since they will not hesitate to make you a single mother and leave the country to marry another women.
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The west isnt for us. That's what I believe now before that I didnt believe it has to do with the west ,but the same struggles are found in every western diaspora .
In African countries Somalis are more successful sometimes even more than the natives Kenya & south Africa for example.
In arab countries they are normal hard working people.
In the west somehow we fail hard . Even many Somalis say it's our own fault ,but now I don't believe that there are many factors that we don't control like hiring discrimination, opportunity inequality .things that prevent us from building a strong community like Kenya or south Africa
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