Educated Somali Men marrying from back home

[Garaad Darawiish]

:siilaanyosmile:

"A trend I’ve noticed is many educated, young Somali guys are going back to Somalia, Kenya and Arab countries to marry women there. The question is why? When there are so many beautiful, educated Somali women here in North America who are also single?

There are couple of reasons behind this trend. One of them is that Somali girls in Somalia for example are seen as “good women”, whereas the ones in the west are seen as “bad women”. It has to do with the upbringing of a lot of these guys who are going over there. Another insidious reasoning is that at the core Somali men love a woman who is submissive, and who he can feel like “the man” around. That means he’s more educated than her in a lot of cases. It’s quite said, but it seems that men love women who are less educated than them. Instead of being happy with their sisters, they choose to make them feel like they’re not “good” as women.

I was in Somalia for 7 months, and let me tell you, as much as I love my country, it’s better to be a man there than a woman. I’m not saying women are abused or anything like that, but it seems like every decision is male oriented. Men in general get better jobs, are better students, and women are prepped to be housewives only. I understand being a civil war ravaged country that is in its developmental stage, it will not be the same as first world countries when it comes to certain gender rights. The bottom line is the men who marry abroad want a submissive woman, who they can control. It’s no wonder many Somali women are marrying “reverts” these days, and I have no problem with this. Deen is the most important thing. Also, another trend I noticed many Somali women are going to Africa to marry Somali guys there. It seems the Somali guys over there happen to “love” the “bad” women from abroad (lol). I think that solves the problems we’re having. All the Somali girls who want to marry a Somali guy should maybe do what the guys have always been doing and go to Africa and find a nice guy from over there.

I’m not trying to put Somali guys down, or “hate” on them, but I’ve come to this conclusion. I don’t want to say all Somali men are this way. There are many Somali men out there who are empowering women daily, and are great brothers, fathers and sons. Also, when it comes to “women rights”, non-Muslims love to say “It’s Islam that is abusing women”, and I don’t agree with that idea, because Islam gave women all the rights they need, it’s just that people who don’t understand Islam have taken away their rights. Big difference." https://drinkingshax.wordpress.com/2013/01/12/somali-men-going-overseas-to-marry/



This is happening more and more, where most of the educated and successful Somali men either go back home or to the middle east to find a spouse. Some even completely marry out to ajnabis and say they prefer non-Somalis over the diaspora raised. This has made a lot of Somali women in the west angry and confused.

What your thoughts on this and why this is happening.
:siilaanyosmile:


P.S: I am also marrying from back home

 

[VixR]

I think the article is mostly on point, except the part about Somali women going abroad to marry Somali men. That's very minimal, especially compared to the numbers of men who go abroad or express wanting to do so. I think it's fine, if that's what you wanna do, go ahead and marry back home or marry out.

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

I think the article is mostly on point, except the part about Somali women going abroad to marry Somali men. That very minimal, especially compared to the numbers of men who go abroad or express wanting to do so. I think it's fine, if that's what you wanna do, go ahead and marry back home or marry out.

i dont plan on marrying out but marrying from back home is ideal. I have seen it all.

Xalimos are to blame for this.Most Somali women are not interested in an educated man. There is no incentive for a young Somali male to ever want to become a book worm, I call it the African Americanisation of Somali males. The vast majority of Somali girls desire a man with drama, a thug, a cool dude. This same woman will berate all men and say: There are no good men. Though, they would never have considered those type of men she is now claiming doesn't exist. Women cannot make rational choices for themselves.
They would never consider a nerd, for example, unless the nerd is white (in which there is no more criteria, bit that's a topic for another day), don't expect a Somali girl to ever swing that way.

Somali men need to be educated and to get their mind out of the gutter and actually find women who appreciate them for who they are. Biggest problem is, they wish to conform to what the woman wants him to be, rather than actually finding someone who likes him for who he is. That's where everything crumbles.

 

[VixR]

i dont plan on marrying out but marrying from back home is ideal. I have seen it all.

Xalimos are to blame for this.Most Somali women are not interested in an educated man. There is no incentive for a young Somali male to ever want to become a book worm, I call it the African Americanisation of Somali males. The vast majority of Somali girls desire a man with drama, a thug, a cool dude. This same woman will berate all men and say: There are no good men. Though, they would never have considered those type of men she is now claiming doesn't exist. Women cannot make rational choices for themselves.
They would never consider a nerd, for example, unless the nerd is white (in which there is no more criteria, bit that's a topic for another day), don't expect a Somali girl to ever swing that way.

Somali men need to be educated and to get their mind out of the gutter and actually find women who appreciate them for who they are. Biggest problem is, they wish to conform to what the woman wants him to be, rather than actually finding someone who likes him for who he is. That's where everything crumbles.

The guys I've seen marry abroad are regular schmoes. One of them was forced into it by his father.

TLDR: Somali women forced Somali men into hood culture.

Got it. Let me try not to laugh.

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

The guys I've seen marry abroad are regular schmoes. One of them was forced into it by his father.

TLDR: Somali women forced Somali men into hood culture.

Got it. Let me try not to laugh.

its true tho lol. Somali women say 'somali men arent educated' but at the same time they are prepared to marry an ajnabi revert who was recently bailed from jail.

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

I've seen many women say things like: "I need a real man to handle me." Or "Only a real man can take care of me."

I often ask the question: Are women wild animals that need to be tamed? Are they like a biological germ warfare chemical experiment that needs to be 'handled with care or risk life threatening injuries/conditions'?

Somali women in their quest to African Americanize themselves have utilised ebonics in the most ugly way. I tell them, uplift yourselves, if you want honour and prestige, look upto whites and compete with the best, rather than the failures of society. Everyone in this world wants to compete with the whites except ans. They want to compete with Blacks in the lowest and most menial endeavours. WTH is there to compete with? A wild hyena could come to America tomorrow and surpass African Americans in a day. If the women continue on this path they will be the least desirable women in the world after black Americans.

 

[TheMadMullah]

Iam one of those who will not marry xalimos from the west and i have several good reasons:

• One good reason i wont do is most somali girls in the west have very weak culture if nothing at all. This is an alarming threat to the future of my children. First of all they will not be able to speak their language but most importantly their (their western minded hooyo) will likely accept them to intermingle with any moving object be it madoows Or cadaans.

• Somalis girls from back home have stronger character ( karti) and more of a go getter than their counterparts in the west despite them being less educated in some cases.

• Somali girls in the west have a history of promiscuity ( not all obviously) and i would not want to end up with a second hand thing.

But i the least I will settle for even when I marry from back home is a xalimo with atleast high school education. I want my woman to be enlighted yet with strong cultural back ground.

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

Iam one of those who will not marry xalimos from the west and i have several good reasons:

• One good reason i wont do is most somali girls in the west have very weak culture if nothing at all. This is an alarming threat to the future of my children. First of all they will not be able to speak their language but most importantly their (their western minded hooyo) will likely accept them to intermingle with any moving object be it madoows Or cadaans.

• Somalis girls from back home have stronger character ( karti) and more of a go getter than their counterparts in the west despite them being less educawed in some cases.

• Somali girls in the west have a history of promiscuity ( not all obviously) and i would not want to end up with a second hand thing.

But i the least I will settle for even when I marry from back home is a xalimo with atleast high school education. I want my woman to be enlighted yet with strong cultural back ground.

i second that. Definitely marrying from my tuulo.

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

i know a lot of well off and highly educated Faraxs. The marriage challenge is that the Xalimo's are confused about their role. They want to be Western (sharing chores and family duties) or Traditional when it suits them (paying bills- it's a Faraxs job though she earns the same or more than him, wants the dahab set, large meher, expensive aroos). Its a parasitic relationship with no major upside. I'd rather go Ajnabi with Amber who is western but not Asha who has a schizophrenic cultural identity.

 

[VixR]

its true tho lol. Somali women say 'somali men arent educated' but at the same time they are prepared to marry an ajnabi revert who was recently bailed from jail.

That's true though. Unfortunately, very few of them pursue higher education, and most of them get caught up in risky business and crime, creating a disproportionate environment of eligible men to women. The women who marry reverts with criminal background are Salafists who rush into marriage and like the zealotry and new deen smell of godly guidance on a newly reverted man. Regular Somali girls date regular other Muslims.

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

Unfortunately, very few of them pursue higher education, and most of them get caught up in risky business and crime, creating a disproportionate environment of eligible men to women. The ones who marry reverts with criminal are Salafists who like the zealotry and new deen smell of godly guidance. Regular Somali girls date regular other Muslims.

If you want to have a successful relationship with a Somali woman you have to be the Alpha from the start. You must dominate and take charge. Like a wild horse you need to break her in using treats and lashes. But these young Farah's of your generation want to be nice and considerate which only confuses this beast of burden who is used to being dominated by all the male figures in her life from her daddy to her brothers.

 

[VixR]

If you want to have a successful relationship with a Somali woman you have to be the Alpha from the start. You must dominate and take charge. Like a wild horse you need to break her in using treats and lashes. But these young Farah's of your generation want to be nice and considerate which only confuses this beast of burden who is used to being dominated by all the male figures in her life from her daddy to her brothers.

Somali guys are not 'nice', generally speaking.

You contradict yourself. How are they 'nice' and the bold at the same time.

 

[Genos]

I don't really see myself doing this.

 

[MadNomad]

That's true though. Unfortunately, very few of them pursue higher education, and most of them get caught up in risky business and crime, creating a disproportionate environment of eligible men to women. The women who marry reverts with criminal background are Salafists who rush into marriage and like the zealotry and new deen smell of godly guidance on a newly reverted man. Regular Somali girls date regular other Muslims.

So most Somali men are criminals

 

[VixR]

So most Somali men are criminals

Too many of them, starting too young.

A young Somali boy in a group is willing to do shit his Indian or Arab counterpart wouldn't to gain 'cred'.

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

Somali guys are not 'nice', generally speaking.

You contradict yourself. How are they 'nice' and the bold at the same time.

Too many of them, starting too young.

A young Somali boy in a group is willing to do shit his Indian or Arab counterpart wouldn't to gain 'cred'.

the only person who is contradicting themselves is you. You say somali men arent nice while u also admit that u dont meet somalis often as u live in a homogeneous cadaan town. How can u generalise somali men as 'not nice' when u dont meet them often

 

[VixR]

the only person who is contradicting themselves is you. You say somali men arent nice while u also admit that u dont meet somalis often as u live in a homogeneous cadaan town. How can u generalise somali men as 'not nice' when u dont meet them often

When you've been seeing Somali men join Mexican gangs for lack full Somali gangs (that I was shocked to hear even existed), you know shit is real. Even in Whitesville, the guys turn to ghetto culture..

There's two very young men facing triple digit robbery charges as we speak.

 

[MadNomad]

Too many of them, starting too young.

A young Somali boy in a group is willing to do shit his Indian or Arab counterpart wouldn't to gain 'cred'.

Too many, i agree. But is it most? I think we'd notice if it was most

 

[kamadare]

:siilaanyosmile:

"A trend I’ve noticed is many educated, young Somali guys are going back to Somalia, Kenya and Arab countries to marry women there. The question is why? When there are so many beautiful, educated Somali women here in North America who are also single?

There are couple of reasons behind this trend. One of them is that Somali girls in Somalia for example are seen as “good women”, whereas the ones in the west are seen as “bad women”. It has to do with the upbringing of a lot of these guys who are going over there. Another insidious reasoning is that at the core Somali men love a woman who is submissive, and who he can feel like “the man” around. That means he’s more educated than her in a lot of cases. It’s quite said, but it seems that men love women who are less educated than them. Instead of being happy with their sisters, they choose to make them feel like they’re not “good” as women.

I was in Somalia for 7 months, and let me tell you, as much as I love my country, it’s better to be a man there than a woman. I’m not saying women are abused or anything like that, but it seems like every decision is male oriented. Men in general get better jobs, are better students, and women are prepped to be housewives only. I understand being a civil war ravaged country that is in its developmental stage, it will not be the same as first world countries when it comes to certain gender rights. The bottom line is the men who marry abroad want a submissive woman, who they can control. It’s no wonder many Somali women are marrying “reverts” these days, and I have no problem with this. Deen is the most important thing. Also, another trend I noticed many Somali women are going to Africa to marry Somali guys there. It seems the Somali guys over there happen to “love” the “bad” women from abroad (lol). I think that solves the problems we’re having. All the Somali girls who want to marry a Somali guy should maybe do what the guys have always been doing and go to Africa and find a nice guy from over there.

I’m not trying to put Somali guys down, or “hate” on them, but I’ve come to this conclusion. I don’t want to say all Somali men are this way. There are many Somali men out there who are empowering women daily, and are great brothers, fathers and sons. Also, when it comes to “women rights”, non-Muslims love to say “It’s Islam that is abusing women”, and I don’t agree with that idea, because Islam gave women all the rights they need, it’s just that people who don’t understand Islam have taken away their rights. Big difference." https://drinkingshax.wordpress.com/2013/01/12/somali-men-going-overseas-to-marry/



This is happening more and more, where most of the educated and successful Somali men either go back home or to the middle east to find a spouse. Some even completely marry out to ajnabis and say they prefer non-Somalis over the diaspora raised. This has made a lot of Somali women in the west angry and confused.

What your thoughts on this and why this is happening.
:siilaanyosmile:


P.S: I am also marrying from back home

 

[Garaad Darawiish]

When you've been seeing Somali men join Mexican gangs for lack full Somali gangs (that I was shocked to hear even existed), you know shit is real. Even in Whitesville, the guys turn to ghetto culture..

There's two very young men facing triple digit robbery charges as we speak.

So their are 2 somalis guys in ur town and they both happen to be crooks. Does this make it fair to judge somali guys ( their millions of us in the diaspora) as not 'nice'. Unless, you go out and socialise with somalis who live in towns where the somali male population isnt 2 ppl, then u have no premise whatsoever to label us as 'not nice'. The same can be applied with the xalimos who are bickering 24/7 on twittter. It wouldnt be a fair generalisation for me to come out and label all xalimos as 'sell-outs' or 'embarassing' solely on the actions of a few ratchet ones.