Exmuslims- Cutting contact with family- Advice needed

[Samaalic Era]

Bad experiences is supposed to make your relationship with Allah swt better, not other way round and become an apostate.

Those experiences are sign for you to turn to Allah swt but you have these arrogant kids who become gaalo, not understanding or reflecting on their situation

 

[Abdisamad]

@Samaalic Era
The western freedom reminds me of dajjal where he is offering people jannah on earth but in reality once you accept the deal you will enter hell.

 

[farax]

What do you mean, most of them probably want to be Muslims but they might’ve had bad experiences with Islam

Bad experiences is supposed to make your relationship with Allah swt better, not other way round and become an apostate.

some people are forced to Islam and could face death if they left it

 

[AarHawd_7]

Sometimes I randomly start asking myself questions about the deen aswell, see if everything adds up it clearly does. But you gotta realize thats the Shaydaan trying to whisper doubts in to you so you start questioning your deen even more.

And that’s dangerous for people with a low Imaan or no connection with Allah swt whatsoever.

 

[Nak Muay]

Well said my brother.. The so called western freedom is nothing but an illusion.. I grew up with these gaalo and have experienced this lifestyle first hand and my conclusion is they are selling you an illusion..

A life solely based around vapid consumerism and hedonism is a receipt for existential anguish and deep-seated unhappiness wallahi. 90% of the non-Somali gaals I met doing the whole"freedom/party" meme when I was younger were just depressed and lost in life wallahi.

 

[Happy_]

I really can't convey how I truly feel about Islam over text but all I can say for now is that I'm trying my best to be a better Muslim

I pray 5 times, I'm on track to finishing the Quran during Ramadan and I haven't miss a single day of fasting.

Yet I still feel a heaviness in my heart and my mind wonders whether I'll truly be happy like this for the rest of my life.

I'm still young and naive so hopefully things change for the better in the future but for now this lifestyle is exhausting me.

The heaviness is the doubt you have, it‘s weighing heavy on your heart. So I‘d recommend praying to Allah He guides your heart, make lots of SINCERE du‘a. You can also make the following du‘a. Also never shy away to ask questions to get rid of doubts. Read books, watch muxadirooyin and pray, pray praaaay.

 

[Atoore]

A bit off topic but would anybody have that video of the old somali guy in the park screaming “soomaali maahan dila dila”

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[Samaalic Era]

The heaviness is the doubt you have, it‘s weighing heavy on your heart. So I‘d recommend praying to Allah He guides your heart, make lots of SINCERE du‘a. You can also make the following du‘a. Also never shy away to ask questions to get rid of doubts. Read books, watch muxadirooyin and pray, pray praaaay.

View attachment 115482

Intelligent and wise, I think I'm falling for you walal

 

[Samaalic Era]

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[Happy_]

Intelligent and wise, I think I'm falling for you walal

Loool, I wish I was wise. One thing I learned in life is that whatever you‘re going through stay close to Allah. Hold tight, cuz the turbulences in life are insane. But Allah will get you through anything and you will come out stronger. Every muslim will go through hardships after hardships, its guaranteed but pls don’t give up on Allah and Islam. Thats what shaytaan wants you to do. May Allah guide anyone who has doubts in their heart.

 

[PhySom]

Don't bother telling your family. Simply move away from your family and visit occasionally.

 

[PhySom]

Oh I don’t plan on ever telling them. I’m going to school but I don’t like the program I’m studying. I do have some certification in it so I can get a decent job but I don’t wish to do it anymore. Should I just move and get a job? Should I cut contact with them? If not how will I explain my just leaving to conservative Muslim somali parents?

Finish School and University. Unless your parent's are ultra religious you shouldn't bother moving until you reach financial independance.

 

[PhySom]

Abaayo most Somali parents don't really care about you being Gaal or not, my family don't mind and they always try to pray and read Koran on me,you should move out and be independent and break the news to them, I swear no one really cares and they will most likely accept you.

Most Somalis are Gaalos anyway they just don't admit it, did you know if you don't pray for four consecutive Fridays you are considered a Gaal according to Islam, most of Somalis only pray during the Ramadan and do all kind of haraam deeds on daily basis yet claim to be Muslims, delusional mf Walahi.

Even in Africa i prayed more then my cousins

 

[Yukon_Niner]

I can defend my beliefs from a position of learning, not just repeating what others have told me

I've challenged the gaals here to debate but no one was up for it. Giving up Islam for gaalnimo merely for carnal desires is Low IQ

No Somali Gaal can defend their beliefs nor explain it

Argue so we can get flooded by a wave of qashins and random niggas harrasing you? I've already been accused of mocking the deen when I haven't and people think you're a gaal is a an actual retort. Why would anyone want to explain their beliefs at that point?

 

[Samaalic Era]

Argue so we can get flooded by a wave of qashins and random niggas harrasing you? I've already been accused of mocking the deen when I haven't and people think you're a gaal is a an actual retort. Why would anyone want to explain their beliefs at that point?

You can make a thread on what you believe and no one will qashin you if you are respectful and want to engage sincerely

 

[Yukon_Niner]

You can make a thread on what you believe and no one will qashin you if you are respectful and want to engage sincerely

I've seen users post logical fallacies and they still got qashined and attacked. After a while they dropped the respect crap.

I don't want to end up like that, plus I'm not here to insult my parents belief's.

 

[Saredo]

I’ve thought about everything from faking a marriage to be able to move out, to just moving out one day while they’re at work and cutting all contact- just leaving a letter telling them to not worry about me.

Will I waste my life trying to make my parents happy and be miserable? Or do I live my life and be happy and break my parents hearts? I don’t dont want to do.

Tough situation. Since you’re not interested in Islam I won’t give you advice on how to work on your imaan. The only thing I can tell you is to not break your parents heart by running away. You’re only 21 so you think you’re invincible, strong and don’t need family. The reality is that you can be easily influenced by ill-intentioned people at that age. Who knows if these strangers/men you’re running to won’t harm you and abuse you? Then what will you do ? You’ll have no family and no faith to help you cope with it. Plus when you get older and become a mom you will regret the pain you caused to your own mother.

 

[Destiny]

Don’t tell them. You’ll ruin your family ties over something you don’t have to do. Just move out when you’re able to financially. If you want a boyfriend, get a boyfriend. But I recommend you don’t tell your parents you’re gaal or cut them off for their sake as well as your own.

Insha’Allah after some time of reflection you will return to Islam sis.

 

[Odkac WRLD]

Knocked out? Caloosha ba isii kala baxdey ninyow.

I thought I’d lose a bit of weight but milkshakes baa every other night isla dhacaa.I blame @Odkac WRLD dude lied so many times before Ramadan about buying me a milkshakes.

Sxb we go Dutch Bro’s when this is over.

 

[Jacki]

I feel this thread has derailed into trying to convert me back to Islam, that’s not going to happen I specifically asked y’all not to do that in the original post.

Thank you to all of the members who gave me advice, I really appreciate it sincerely.

I don’t plan on finishing studying because I hate the program I’m studying (nursing) and from experience in working in a clinical setting I know I won’t be happy doing that so why bother putting more years into that. I’d just be wasting years of my life. I know something else I’m good at and will make good money off. I’m tired of wasting my life. I feel like a coward, keep putting off what needs to be done

I’m leaning towards suggesting the idea of my leaving for school in a different state/country, which my parents will of course immediately reject, then I’ll pack up and leave while they’re gone, call my mother from the airport telling her I’ve accepted the offer to study abroad. Tell her I have to do this and I love her and remain in contact, and slower lessen the contact, so that we talk one or twice a month. And over time I’ll visit on occasion but stay in a hotel as I wouldn’t feel safe being in the home alone with them. I’ll save up while I’m gone and first time I come back I’ll give them at least 50k in cash so hopeful that’ll make them forgive me a bit. This way I don’t cut contact completely but they don’t have control I’ve my life as easily but I’m still there when needed.

You gotta take some risks in life right? This might just be the best thing I ever did. Might be a mistake, but at least it’ll be an exciting adventure. Either way I’m willing to live with the consequences. I’m tired of being cowardly. I need to take this risk.