I was driving my brother to my parents' house for a big old get together. We all live in different cities and rarely see each other, so it's nice to touch base from time to time. My younger bro is not politically sophisticated. He was telling me how much he adores Rachel Maddow, and thinks Keith Olbermann is an intellectual titan. I would love to drop these people on a dunghill, but I fear they might contaminate the dung.
I told him Pepe is where the truth is at, and that Crooked Hillary was an enemy of God. Hell, even Satan wants nothing to do with her and that's saying something. Respect to Shaytan if he's reading this. The old kafir has integrity. Anyway, that's neither here nor there. Here's what astonished me. The kid told me that he wants to do misyaar. "What the hell is that?" I said. He told me it's a kind of Islamic marriage where you can sleep with the woman, but not provide financially. "So you wanna smash and dash?" I asked.
"It's better than zina, that's for sure. Half the Somali youth are getting off to ography and the other half are screwing out of wedlock."
"Isn't that a bit of a huge undertaking just for some wet fun? What if she's annoying to live with? Shouldn't you date and see what the little dhoocil is like?"
"Not really, you can have a no fault divorce at any time. Heck, you can even stipulate that you will divorce after a certain number of days during the nikaax. You don't even have to live together. Our religion makes things easy for young people without means. That's the beauty of al-Islam."
Just as he said that a bunch of Asian women in miniskirts crossed the road. One of them, tottering uneasily in high heels like a toddler with ambulatory difficulties, bent over to adjust her shoes, and I saw in all its splendor where the next generation of her ethnic group would come out of. Acudhu billahi mini shaytani rajeem. I could have used a misyaar then and there to be honest. The weekend always brings out the in Pakistani sisters.
"Sounds like having a girlfriend" I said. "Except you don't call her your GF, but your wife. A bit like dating. Very informal arrangement."
"Dating is for workers of iniquity. You have to keep it lawful" he replied.
"What does that mean?"
"Iniquity? It means dambi."
"No, I meant "lawful". I'm not too bright".
Got me thinking. Isn't this the solution to all these sexually frustrated youngsters who can't get no action? We frown on GFs and BFs, but biological needs don't vanish just because you frown. I dread using other people's smartphone these days because I know its covered in the icky substance you get after they jerk off to on their cell phone. No wonder I was on intimate terms with barnyard animals growing up in Kismaayo. The kacsi is strong in spotty little teens. Kids start dreaming of sex at ten years old and don't get married till their twenties and thirties.
My kids are definitely gonna get their loins wet in their teens. Instead of doing it in the bush and catching STDs, he's gonna bring the People of the Book home honorably, and say "aabo, do the nikaax ceremony. I wanna show Katie something special" and work out his frustrations on his king sized bed.
I told this to my bro. He said "Yeah, sounds like enlightened parenting. And if he fancies a change of partner, he can arrange it so that the marriage lasts for the duration of the sex. Hi wife, bye wife."
"Get a new sweetie everyday?"
"Pretty much."
"So scholars have thought about every contingency eh? Mashallah. All before the kuffar and their modern ways. If only @AbdiJew knew this, he would not have joined Qowmu Lut"
"Who is AbdiJew?"
"He's the Alt Right version of @Cognitivedissonance"
"I don't follow. The best thing is there is no acrimonious divorce after the nikaax. It's all preagreed to be of short duration if you so please."
"No alimony either"
"True connubial bliss"
"What does that mean?"
"Connubial? It means marital"
"No, "bliss". Keep it simple, man. You're not doing a PhD thesis."
"Bet you don't know what PhD stands for"
"Doctor of Philosophy"
"No, it stands for Pretty Huge Dick".
So, how about it, would you guys pull a misyaar on your lover? So many folks are gonna burn in Jahannam for illicit sex. May Allah protect the Muslimeen from this great fitnah. Ameen, ya Rabb, thumma ameen
I told him Pepe is where the truth is at, and that Crooked Hillary was an enemy of God. Hell, even Satan wants nothing to do with her and that's saying something. Respect to Shaytan if he's reading this. The old kafir has integrity. Anyway, that's neither here nor there. Here's what astonished me. The kid told me that he wants to do misyaar. "What the hell is that?" I said. He told me it's a kind of Islamic marriage where you can sleep with the woman, but not provide financially. "So you wanna smash and dash?" I asked.
"It's better than zina, that's for sure. Half the Somali youth are getting off to ography and the other half are screwing out of wedlock."
"Isn't that a bit of a huge undertaking just for some wet fun? What if she's annoying to live with? Shouldn't you date and see what the little dhoocil is like?"
"Not really, you can have a no fault divorce at any time. Heck, you can even stipulate that you will divorce after a certain number of days during the nikaax. You don't even have to live together. Our religion makes things easy for young people without means. That's the beauty of al-Islam."
Just as he said that a bunch of Asian women in miniskirts crossed the road. One of them, tottering uneasily in high heels like a toddler with ambulatory difficulties, bent over to adjust her shoes, and I saw in all its splendor where the next generation of her ethnic group would come out of. Acudhu billahi mini shaytani rajeem. I could have used a misyaar then and there to be honest. The weekend always brings out the in Pakistani sisters.
"Sounds like having a girlfriend" I said. "Except you don't call her your GF, but your wife. A bit like dating. Very informal arrangement."
"Dating is for workers of iniquity. You have to keep it lawful" he replied.
"What does that mean?"
"Iniquity? It means dambi."
"No, I meant "lawful". I'm not too bright".
Got me thinking. Isn't this the solution to all these sexually frustrated youngsters who can't get no action? We frown on GFs and BFs, but biological needs don't vanish just because you frown. I dread using other people's smartphone these days because I know its covered in the icky substance you get after they jerk off to on their cell phone. No wonder I was on intimate terms with barnyard animals growing up in Kismaayo. The kacsi is strong in spotty little teens. Kids start dreaming of sex at ten years old and don't get married till their twenties and thirties.
My kids are definitely gonna get their loins wet in their teens. Instead of doing it in the bush and catching STDs, he's gonna bring the People of the Book home honorably, and say "aabo, do the nikaax ceremony. I wanna show Katie something special" and work out his frustrations on his king sized bed.
I told this to my bro. He said "Yeah, sounds like enlightened parenting. And if he fancies a change of partner, he can arrange it so that the marriage lasts for the duration of the sex. Hi wife, bye wife."
"Get a new sweetie everyday?"
"Pretty much."
"So scholars have thought about every contingency eh? Mashallah. All before the kuffar and their modern ways. If only @AbdiJew knew this, he would not have joined Qowmu Lut"
"Who is AbdiJew?"
"He's the Alt Right version of @Cognitivedissonance"
"I don't follow. The best thing is there is no acrimonious divorce after the nikaax. It's all preagreed to be of short duration if you so please."
"No alimony either"
"True connubial bliss"
"What does that mean?"
"Connubial? It means marital"
"No, "bliss". Keep it simple, man. You're not doing a PhD thesis."
"Bet you don't know what PhD stands for"
"Doctor of Philosophy"
"No, it stands for Pretty Huge Dick".
So, how about it, would you guys pull a misyaar on your lover? So many folks are gonna burn in Jahannam for illicit sex. May Allah protect the Muslimeen from this great fitnah. Ameen, ya Rabb, thumma ameen
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