LADIES ONLY TOPIC: "Hijab" or Scarf? Let's discuss modest attire and behaviour

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

I believe that women should be free to dress however they want, and they should not be pressured or forced to wear any specific clothing. Hijab should be a personal choice, and it should be a choice made for religious purposes instead of cultural or societal pressure. if hijab if a journey, then why take issue with women who are trying to be modest but don’t fit your ideal. They are obviously trying but y’all want to hand out judgment like you are gods.

I wasn’t being rude whether you like or not you are regurgitating sexist talking points and you talking about women having “divine femininity” doesn’t make it less misguided and misogynistic

But, when someone wears a cloth on their head with tight clothing, that is not being modest?
It's more modest to not wear a cloth on your head and instead just wear loose, modest attire.

I am not posing like a 'god', and sadly, yes, you are being rude. Maybe you're not doing it on purpose.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

— Surah An-Nur 24:30-31

 

[Salma813]

Firstly, Allah SWT, has commanded that women must cover themselves and that only after marriage, is a man able to see her beauty. Her beauty is for herself, her family/mahrem and her husband. It's not 'misogynist' or 'offensive', it's Islam.

I never said that women don't have inherent value, I have always maintained that women are qaali and as such, qaali means that not everyone has access to your presence, let alone can catch a glimpse of you in your full regalia.

Thirdly, again, I don't force hijab on everyone. I take issue with those that put a cloth on their head and call it hijab. Not once did I say that all women must wear hijab.

Fourthly, again, women have inherent value, and have you ever seen the most valuable people in life, accessible to everyone?? I think not.

Firstly, Allah SWT, has commanded that women must cover themselves and that only after marriage, is a man able to see her beauty. Her beauty is for herself, her family/mahrem and her husband. It's not 'misogynist' or 'offensive', it's Islam.

I never said that women don't have inherent value, I have always maintained that women are qaali and as such, qaali means that not everyone has access to your presence, let alone can catch a glimpse of you in your full regalia.

Thirdly, again, I don't force hijab on everyone. I take issue with those that put a cloth on their head and call it hijab. Not once did I say that all women must wear hijab.

Fourthly, again, women have inherent value, and have you ever seen the most valuable people in life, accessible to everyone?? I think not.t.

You’ve have said that women are lowering their value but not covering up and allowing men to see their beauty. That’s clearly what you said or am I wrong? That’s what I took with issue the most

Value and modesty are separate topics, and they are not connected in the way you may think. Women are not less valid if they choose to wear revealing clothing or if they are "easy" to access.

Finally, just because someone is valuable does not mean they should be covered or treated as a commodity.

 

[Mudug_gyal]

Some body types cant get away with wearing clothes considered modest on other hijabis. I stopped wearing pants and only wear abayas or long skirts now. I want to wear jilbab full time but it’s considered inappropriate in professional settings I wear it sometimes

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

You’ve have said that women are lowering their value but not covering up and allowing men to see their beauty. That’s clearly what you said or am I wrong? That’s what I took with issue the most

Value and modesty are separate topics, and they are not connected in the way you may think. Women are not less valid if they choose to wear revealing clothing or if they are "easy" to access.

Finally, just because someone is valuable does not mean they should be covered or treated as a commodity.

No, I said that by nature women are qaali, by that I mean, just by virtue of being a woman.


Whether we like it or not, hijab was decreed to women, and if some of us misinterpret the message or give it in a wrong way, ultimately, the fact remains; we must wear hijab.

And those of us who don't practice Islam, guess what? "There is no compulsion in faith"

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Some body types cant get away with wearing clothes considered modest on other hijabis. I stopped wearing pants and only wear abayas or long skirts now. I want to wear jilbab full time but it’s considered inappropriate in professional settings I wear it sometimes

Oh facts. Some of us are busty, have larger derriers/both, so can't wear the same clothes others can. It's sad but it's the truth.

There are large scarf + Abaya combos that can be worn in a professional setting sis.

 

[Mudug_gyal]

If women truly care about being 'feminist', one of their top priorities is fighting the male gaze.

Most of the fashion and makeup trends they follow, are peddled by White Khaniis men. Not to mention the White straight men, who work in advertising, who train women how to dress and behave.

That's why there are segments of feminists, who even go as far as to repulse men, because they are fighting these sexist ideals projected onto them.

The modern entertainment industry, even trains women to act and dress like sex kittens. One look at the modern-day 'night out' looks like a stroll in the red light district. Meanwhile the men are fully dressed. What happened to equality? Why aren't the men half-dressed.

Women wear it because they want to adhere by societal expectations 100% even If they say theyre wearing it for themselves. I wear makeup because it makes me prettier Ik its haram but may Allah guide me

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Women wear it because they want to adhere by societal expectations 100% even If they say theyre wearing it for themselves. I wear makeup because it makes me prettier Ik its haram but may Allah guide me

Believe me, I understand the struggles very well!! This is part of jihad of the Nafs.

And as women, we must be open with our issues, instead of pretending that we're doing it all correctly, or trying to twist the faith to suit our individual needs.

 

[Mudug_gyal]

Believe me, I understand the struggles very well!! This is part of jihad of the Nafs.

And as women, we must be open with our issues, instead of pretending that we're doing it all correctly, or trying to twist the faith to suit our individual needs.

The Prophet said “Speak the truth even if its against yourself” We have to be self aware pray to Allah so he can turn away our hearts from sins. I am sticking to a really strict skin regimen rn It made my skin so smooth and even I dont even wear make up that much rn only for weddings and events, going out.

 

[Salma813]

Thirdly, some women DO, purposefully, display their assets, in order to attract attention, and then knowingly, or unknowingly arouse the wrong kind of attention. My main issue with this, is again, why do these men deserve this? Why are women lowering their inherent value? And can women take responsibility for the parts they play in life

This is clearly what you said, that women are qaali and that the women that don’t cover themselves are lowering their value or I’m I reading wrong??

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

This is clearly what you said, that women are qaali and that the women that don’t cover themselves are lowering their value or I’m I reading wrong??

I never said they lose value, my main gripe is with purposefully or unwittingly catering to the male gaze. I just don't think men deserve to see feminine beauty, or not at its full wattage.

 

[Kalsoon]

Some body types cant get away with wearing clothes considered modest on other hijabis. I stopped wearing pants and only wear abayas or long skirts now. I want to wear jilbab full time but it’s considered inappropriate in professional settings I wear it sometimes

Never has anyone in any professional setting said my jilbab was inappropriate. Who said that to you?

 

[Mudug_gyal]

Never has anyone in any professional setting said my jilbab was inappropriate. Who said that to you?

Tell me when have you seen a jilbab in an office?

 

[Kalsoon]

This is my opinion from my lived experiences: women who dress like that are fully aware of how the tight fit of their clothes can increase the number of male eyes on them. I fully believe they have low self esteem or self-respect to even need to receive an ego boost from male attention. They believe they’re being fresh/ independent/self-expressive and free thinking by rebelling in their outfit choices. It’s not really free thinking when they try hard to dress as similarly as possible to non-Muslims who are the majority in the west. A small piece of fabric covering the dome with strands of hair showing isn’t the definition of hijab which they choose to ignore.

another reason is many young gabdho who don’t know themselves well enough (yet) simply start following the trends they see even if they weren’t raised like that so they could be easily accepted by the less religious people around them. It’s sad but there has to come a time and point where people who are past puberty stop blaming their parents for their own actions in life. Even if hooyo and aabo didn’t explain hijab properly to them, nothing is stopping them from investing their own time into learning their religion in order to seek nearness to Allah. I believe it’s a toxic cycle that many get caught up in once they start dressing that way. They feel a thrill every time someone admires their tight fitting clothes/body shape. It’s a source of confidence for many which is hard to let go of if one can’t get that sense of self-confidence and self-worth from within.

I believe people who dress with the tight clothes think that dressing that way will help them become more successful in dunya. The people who live for now and want instant gratification.

 

[Kalsoon]

Tell me when have you seen a jilbab in an office?

It’s not about seeing it. Lol. As long as your clothes are clean and presentable, whats the issue? No one is stopping you, are they?

 

[Mudug_gyal]

It’s not about seeing it. Lol
No one is stopping you, are they?

True. But I think theres a certain code for office. I want to wear it dont get me wrong. Its just that I dont see any people donning it

 

[Kalsoon]

True. But I think theres a certain code for office. I want to wear it dont get me wrong. Its just that I dont see any people donning it

You adhere to the code as closely as possible while still dressing as a Muslim. I work in a hospital and I choose to wear a scrub skirt where some choose to wear scrub pants. That’s a personal choice. If you’re in the us, no one can tell you to not dress in accordance to your religion. There are two types of people in this world-those with conviction and those without it. Do with that as you wish.

 

[Gojo Satoru]

I don't think you have to wear a hijab in order to be modest. Hijab is forced on a lot of somali girls when they're young. I've seen literal babies wearing it which the implications for are a bit messed up even if that isn't the parent's intention. So a lot of young girls grow up without learning the intent behind wearing a hijab and that's why you see them wearing tight clothes and doing other haram things.

 

[Gojo Satoru]

I believe that women should be free to dress however they want, and they should not be pressured or forced to wear any specific clothing. Hijab should be a personal choice, and it should be a choice made for religious purposes instead of cultural or societal pressure. if hijab if a journey, then why take issue with women who are trying to be modest but don’t fit your ideal. They are obviously trying but y’all want to hand out judgment like you are gods.

I wasn’t being rude whether you like or not you are regurgitating sexist talking points and you talking about women having “divine femininity” doesn’t make it less misguided and misogynistic

I agree with your sentiments and don't think women should be treated as less valuable just because they aren't dressed modestly. Many of the supposedly religous men here brag about committing Zina while not hesitating to call someone else a kaffir. We already get so much flak from them so why be so judgmental towards women who aren't modest? I get that it's not permissible in Islam to be immodest but we're humans and we aren't perfect.