Murtad Xalimo Critises Older Brothers being Protective

[Kisame]

He’s 8 years older than me. It got bad when I was 12-16. So he was 20-24 verbally and physically abusing me. It was so bad . I was cutting myself, too depressed to do my school work so I was failing classes, and cried everyday. But then covid it stopped cause he moved out. Now he’s 28 tryna apologize but that door is closed forever. He cried when I didn’t let him come to my high school graduation but I didn’t give a f*ck.

Being in your 20s and harassing your 12 year old sister about her virginity is fucking insane.

Bro just sounds like a loser honestly.

 

[_Yusuf_]

I was watching and thinking maybe this is an issue and maybe there is some type of abuse but at the end she goes on to list examples and she’s starts talking about older brothers shouldn’t be commenting on your clothing choices or asking you why you are coming late at night

I would smoke fent if I had a sister like this

 

[_Yusuf_]

Fatherless children

It's pretty obvious no Somali father is accepting this behavior.

 

[3LetterzMM]

I have older sisters and it goes both ways honestly they love to pull rank on you act like they yo momma. This is just an older sibling thing in general.

 

[Barwaaqoforsomalia]

I’m going to give her the benefit of the doubt and suggest that she maybe talking about the way you dress within the household around your family and not how you dress outside.

For example, one of my cousins used to tell me her older brother didn’t allow her to wear just pants and a t-shirt in the house because he thought it was inappropriate. This is again in the house around her family and not outside because she wears the hijab outside.

 

[soulmates]

Some Somali parents are stricter than others. I've realized a lot of us didn't really grow up in similar households. Some parents made their households hell for their kids.

Yeah. I never got how some girls were allowed to wear pants or not wear the hijab and not get their teeth knocked out especially with Somali parents (I thought everyone were like my parents lmao).

Some of y’all are lucky and have chill parents I’m jelly

 

[Bari]

Im an oldest male in my family and im protective of my younger siblings, if i see something i dont like i call for them to come into the living room and i give them a proper one on one talk.

 

[novanova]

Her bros are based enough to tell her to act respectable and not be out late but can't deal with her accordingly for being a gaal.

What is there to deal with? How do you deal with somebody being a ’murtad’?

 

[novanova]

Yeah i tried finding her tiktok video but its been awhile. She made a slide show of wht was happening and now she lives by herself i think. I blame the parents cuz why tf are u not stopping the abuse like especially when she pretty much raised him and changed his diapers....like ?? Other somali families tht ive met usually have some type of respect for the older daughter.

Idk If the father is in the picture.. but I’ve noticed there’s a very weird dynamic in families where the father is absent, the male kids don’t know their role.. it’s the parents job to police their kids (daughters in this case), a sibling can’t check another sibling.. unless there is a significant age gap

 

[Unicorn]

My older brother was like this. Nigga was more strict and obsessive than my dad. I used to get beat by him for not saying my cashar correctly and he would hit me and force me to change when he considered by abaya too short. Not to even mention the verbal abuse.

I’ll never forget one time nigga locked me and him in his room because when he was picking me up from school a guy gave me back a pencil I let him borrow and said bye to me when I was 14 and he saw. When we got home he beat the shit out of me and called me a wh0r3, b¡tçh, $lüt, etc. While he was beating me he was forcing me to answer if I was a virgin or not (I was and still am) and my parents allowed it like wtf. After 2020 (when I was 16) I stopped talking to him and haven’t talked to him since then even though he’s tried to apologize like f*ck you


His abuse lowkey the reason why I stopped believing.

Wow....im sorry tht happened to u...did he grow up in somalia?? Either way im glad u didnt forgive him for tht. Those types are dangerous. I remember tht one somali girl who got beat tf up and had her bruised face on tiktok and how many guys back home and overseas talking about how her bros should have her. Tht was traumatic.

 

[The truth seeker]

I do not think she is murtad, we really need to stop dropping these hard words here and there with no facts to back it up. Who knows she could be admitted to paradise before you lots. Stopping being so judgmentals and sentimentals all the times. She has rights to voice her opinions and we need to respect that.

As we can see she is westernized so no need to confront her knowing her priviledge background. We should just explain to her that her brothers are doing the right things by protecting her since it is a dangerous world we live in with predators everywhere.

It may sometime sound harsh from her brothers but they do not mean harm. She should be lucky to have good brothers who protect her but they too should also show her that they can back her up at times so she not only sees one side of the love.

She is coming from a good family. We can all tell from the love she is getting. Thats why she needs to focus on the positive.

Wallahi you are among the most intelligent people on this forum Allah bless you brother you posts are always balanced and nuanced

 

[The truth seeker]

When there is no father present usually the older brother lets his younger siblings do whatever they want looking back I should have put my sister in line more often


Somali moms retire from parenting when you turn 16 and let you do whatever this is the result if another male tries to give advice to the fatherless kid male or female hey will react in a confrontational way

 

[Taintedlove]

I would assume brothers are gonna be more lenient than parents

Only if you have chill siblings. The brothers she's talking about are those that act like a dad and are basically stalkers. They're very controlling, and they're usually the ones who do honour killings and stuff

 

[Taintedlove]

When there is no father present usually the older brother lets his younger siblings do whatever they want looking back I should have put my sister in line more often


Somali moms retire from parenting when you turn 16 and let you do whatever this is the result if another male tries to give advice to the fatherless kid male or female hey will react in a confrontational way

But what right do they have? Once they become responsible for their own behaviour let them make their own decisions. Older siblings are their to guide, not to parent.

 

[The truth seeker]

But what right do they have? Once they become responsible for their own behaviour let them make their own decisions. Older siblings are their to guide, not to parent.

I agree if they don’t listen it’s there life can’t force them to do anything

 

[rin]

Idk If the father is in the picture.. but I’ve noticed there’s a very weird dynamic in families where the father is absent, the male kids don’t know their role.. it’s the parents job to police their kids (daughters in this case), a sibling can’t check another sibling.. unless there is a significant age gap

I think it's a weird entitlement that because they're male, they're allowed to do anything to their sisters. i never had to deal with that, luckily, because my brother didn't care about how I lived my life but I knew a lot of arab girls who had super strict brothers they had to deal with. jokes on them though those girls still did whatever they wanted, even chasing boys but they just kept it lowkey.

 

[Nur_]

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[Yusuf Abdi Ali Rashid]

Her brother needs to run it back and beat her again

 

[Hurder]

Dont raise your kids in the west.

 

[Hurder]

Abuse isn’t an option anybody should take. It would be better if your wife or female sibling. Tries to get them closer to Islam. Since alot of women rebel they dont like hearing anything from men. Thats why usually women are an good choice here. Abuse only makes it worser. They’re gonna rebel even more