Somali Dating Scene for the (27+)

[paragon]

No one says you have to get married young and pop babies less than one-year in. I'm not even saying it's a lost cause. I'm stating the obvious which is as women get older their pool of potential mates gets smaller because their networks shrink over time.Their peers also get married off, leaving fewer eligible mates. As men get older they develop a desire to marry younger women. You can circle around the truth all you want @miski or even give me exceptions but they ain't the rule.

Many women spend their 20’s becoming powerful and independent (education, salary, etc.) often end up unhappy in their 30s. When they finally achieve independence and look for men who have done the same, the realize they’re not looking for powerful, independent women in their 30s; they’re looking for attractive women in their 20s that will make them feel powerful.

 

[Abdalla]

I just read the first page. There's nothing wrong with getting married back home. If you've been back home you will see that most youngsters have more drive than their diaspora counter part.

 

[John Michael]

No one says you have to get married young and pop babies less than one-year in. I'm not even saying it's a lost cause. I'm stating the obvious which is as women get older their pool of potential mates gets smaller because their networks shrink over time.Their peers also get married off, leaving fewer eligible mates. As men get older they develop a desire to marry younger women. You can circle around the truth all you want @miski or even give me exceptions but they ain't the rule.

I think you're looking at the solely from the male perspective.

I'll be blunt, finding a guy to marry you is extremely easy at any age for a woman. The problem is finding a guy you are compatible with and share similar values with.

Even though I do not know sophisticate all that well, from what I gather those Would be the type of guys she would have rejected at 19 and would still be rejecting at 29. They tend to also carry a lot of baggage in terms of how they view women and would be totally incompatible with a girl like soph. No love lost there.

Personally they would be my worst nightmare. A guy who needs to feel 'powerful' through his wife being inferior to him in some way. :/

 

[Zayd]

Excommunicating my age group like were irrelevant.

 

[padrone]

Okay. i dont usually comment, but i have read this thread and every second i read more, theres a sad vibe im getting from it!
This what i observed from sophisticate:
Shes getting lounely and old, she knows her biological clock is ticking. Shes bit materialistic naag!
And as her name implies she has inflated ego. She set her standards very higher than its thus sophisticating more than its.
Clearly she made huge mistake by not marrying early when she should have, what was she expecting in her late twenties? Idk but i guess like any westernized xaliimo she spent her younger years doin her 'thing'!
Another thing i observed, she sounds bit feminist, which prolly standin on her way to accomplish her full potential naaganimo!
As others already suggested her to look into arranged dating/marriage, shes not interested in that too, which means shes no strong desire yet.
This is what happens when you are against nature, sophi!
Dont supress your naagnimo, let go!
Your attitude shapes your life.

PS: english is not my first language, i apologize if i came as blunt or tryin to offend ur feelin or anythin like that, im not saying to lower ur self esteem or sell urself short. Im sayin u just kinda fuckd up to prioritize ur important life goals.
U shudnt have complicated ur life by wastin ur golden years with bunch of useless degrees that were used to rip u off ur folks hard earnd money!
Unless u were goin to save somalia which apparently you dont even want cuz 'you dont share the same vision' with people in there!
Hope u get lucky!

Peace!

 

[paragon]

Imma be real with you @miski. Soph has some value in the marriage marketplace, no sexual experience and good looks judging from somnet. She has the right to be choosy. Haha, but if she's going to act holier than thou that won't help her secure a man that's compatible. Her chances of landing a high status Somali man, which is rare as f*ck will diminish with time. And if she hasn't even bothered to enter the market she'll be an unopened canned good, which may have a long shelf life but will become less appetizing as menopause approaches. Even cookies go stale after a while, dee and moldy if you wait too long. At least let a good one have a bite the halaal way.

 

[Sophisticate]

@Abdullah I'm not looking for brothers back home.

@Zayd you're more than welcome to make a topic about your age group.

@miski
You said it all!

 

[Sophisticate]

@padrone walaal stop assuming. I'm not a feminist. Do you even know my views about Somalis or what I will do "back home" in the future for that matter? How are my degrees useless? Moreover, I'm Samaroon - so higher education is a must. My parents are university educated. And my father has a Masters in a STEM program. The last thing my parents had in mind for me is to be a young bride with little autonomy and thwarted ambition.

@paragon comparing me to perishable goods will get you nowhere. Concern yourself less with 'alaabta' and more the topic. I'm not near menopause and after Somali women reach their mid-20s you folks erroneously label them old/ pre-menopausal. My primary aim in life was never marriage and children. It was considered an incidental part of life, not the end all and be all. @miski is right the brothers I passed up in my youth, I would not take a chance on now. If we had different priorities/values/goals then, how would that change with a few years? I'm not apt to change my mind.

 

[padrone]

@padrone walaal stop assuming. I'm not a feminist. Do you even know my views about Somalis or what I will do "back home" in the future for that matter? How are my degrees useless? Moreover, I'm Samaroon - so higher education is a must. My parents are university educated. And my father has a Masters in a STEM program. The last thing my parents had in mind for me is to be a young bride with little autonomy and thwarted ambition.

@paragon comparing me to perishable goods will get you nowhere. Concern yourself less with 'alaabta' and more the topic. I'm not near menopause and after Somali women reach their mid-20s you folks erroneously label them old/ pre-menopausal. My primary aim in life was never marriage and children. It was considered an incidental part of life, not the end all and be all. @miski is right the brothers I passed up in my youth, I would not take a chance on now. If we had different priorities/values/goals then, how would that change with a few years? I'm not apt to change my mind.

aw man! your gadabuursi, srsly? that must explain ur big ego or should i say big ambition.
i read some history about ur people how they wrote some version of somali language and about first university in somaliland amoud!
despite all of ur over educated people theres still no much progress and ur people are goin backward and some are already starting to copy the mooryaan by distabilizing somaliland.
hope you could bring much awaitd change

 

[John Michael]

@padrone

Your advice would be useful if Sophi wanted the type of guy who impregnates his wife with 8 children and dumps her for a miskeen 20 year old in Somalia, who he then also dumps for getting too demanding. Some how I don't think very many women find this lifestyle appealing.

Naagnimo iyo raaganimo are subjective.

Edit: the idiot injected qabil politics into a dating thread. Qabayalaad is an infection.

 

[padrone]

@padrone

Your advice would be useful if Sophi wanted the type of guy who impregnates his wife with 8 children and dumps her for a miskeen 20 year old in Somalia, who he then also dumps for getting too demanding. Some how I don't think very many women find this lifestyle appealing.

Naagnimo iyo raaganimo are subjective.

Edit: the idiot injected qabil politics into a dating thread. Qabayalaad is an infection.

@miski lol im not qabiilist imho. sophi is the one whos injecting qabiil in the thread as she said she was samaroon and higher edu is a must, as if all other qabiils were supposed to be reer miyi illiterates!
its just my opinion. i have few friends from said qabiil who are more inclined to education than the other qabiils. and yes you cud find evry qabiil has some noble intellectuals and role models for every other qabiil. thats all im sayin.
im new here dont drag me in qabiil bullshit, lemme keep clean sheet!

back to the dating case.
@miski i see u only think naaganimo is just gettin married and 'impregnated'. right?
i think u have warped views of marriage lifestyle prolly cuz of the decreasing marriage between somalis abroad!
anyway my point is, a woman could start a family be the breadwinner and still achieve her life goals be it small or big!
i dont think a faarax with somali mentality, superiority complex and few kids could stop her succeeding. i mean who will dump a fariid xaliimo full of love and wax kasta, who got bunch of fancy degrees earns more than him and cares the welfare of their family?
as u said the divorce problem is just a xaliimo whos difficult and too demanding. right?

also with the increasin divorce rate of somalis, i guess its high time we incourage every xaliimo to be armed with whatever degrees she wants and to be self sufficient so incase a faarax bails on them or some unforseen problem she could take care of her caruur and herself!

but i think this isnt the case, u have somethin else goin on for yall xaliimas complainin here.
caadi iska dhiga,insha allah wixi ilaahay idin qorey waad heleysaan! or else theres still some good news in paradise about young virgin men!
@sophisticate keep doin ur thang!

 

[Sophisticate]

@padrone It seems like you know very little about Gadabursi people, they have never collectively tried to destabilize Somaliland, they have not pilfered and pillaged any Somali town/city. They are certainly not the reason the country went into anarchy/civil war either. In fact, they are more inclined toward peace. I mentioned a fact that they have a strong value for education and that many of my relatives are highly educated. Did I exclude people from other tribes from academic attainment/achievement? No. So I suggest you quit your boat load of generalizations. You don't know me, yet you assume to know me. Caadi Iska Dhig. Let me fan the fire. I'm primarily interested in nimaan Samaroon/Gadabursi. I thank somnet and sspot for making me see the light and realize the truth. Say it loud, say it proud! I am a qabilist only when it comes to marriage!

 

[paragon]

Tisk, Tisk. You're narrowing you're pool. First you want them Somali and 29 and up. Now it's you're tribe. Don't tell me sub-clan is next. Is this a reaction to @padrone? I predicted this when you were on somnet. Our nigga djbsomali might join because of you.

 

[Sophisticate]

Tisk, Tisk. You're narrowing you're pool. First you want them Somali and 29 and up. Now it's you're tribe. Don't tell me sub-clan is next. Is this a reaction to @padrone? I predicted this when you were on somnet. Our nigga djbsomali might join because of you.

Doesn't matter what my rationale behind it was. If you bring djbsomali (my favourite jibril yonis 'reer axmed') brother don't forget to bring his companion, Khalid Ali (my second favourite sacad muuse). They were inseparable.

I've been drifting on my topic. Dating and Somalis appears like a very confusing topic. Partly because we consider it haram. Owning to the fact that western dating subsumes physical contact is expected and we deem it to be a consequence of. I don't believe that it is. That is contingent upon the persons and their will-power/boundaries. We can't leave it up to that alone so why not keep it halaal in every respect and bring a wali. Any objections? A man would think twice about his intentions if he sees your father or brother within close range.

 

[paragon]

I've been drifting on my topic. Dating and Somalis seems like a very confusing topic. Partly because we consider it haram. Owning to the fact that western dating subsumes physical contact expected and we deem it to be a consequence of. I don't believe that it is. That is contingent upon the persons and their will-power/boundaries. We can't leave it up to that alone so why not keep it halaal in every respect and bring a wali. Any objections? A man would think twice about his intentions if he sees your father or brother within close range.

I don't think a man would come to a date if the aabo is backing heat. I'm just saying.