Tales of the first wife.

[Gibiin-Udug]

This subject confuses me. When a Somali man or Muslim man seeks a second wife. One side of me feels angry for the first wife, how could he disregard her feelings and seek another stranger to marry, throw away all the trust that they were building, the home they built. The other side of me wonders, if this man was really happy in his home and satisfied with his wife, would he selfishly seek a second wife? If a man is happy in his home, gets treated with respect, I don't expect him to marry a second wife. As I got older I realized that most men are not happy in their home. Either the wife selfishly stopped taking care of herself and husband and put the kids first without realizing it. Or there's no LOVE in that home. I finally understand the need for Somali men to seek a second wife.


What do you think of this?

 

[Duchess]

I disagree. If the man doesn't love his wife or if she let herself go and he's no longer attracted to her, then why not divorce her? This is nothing more than halal cheating and it's unfair to hold the women responsible for their stupid choices.

 

[Freebandz]

i think you should stop making the same topics over and over again
if i remember correctly you made the same exact topic when this site was made if anything it was your first thread
http://www.somalispot.com/threads/being-a-second-wife.14/
what i deduce from your obsession is that you want to be a second wife.

 

[Inactive]

Most men from any religious background would like a second wife. It's easier than cheating, something that many men do

 

[Gibiin-Udug]

I disagree. If the man doesn't love his wife or if she let herself go and he's no longer attracted to her, then why not divorce her? This is nothing more than halal cheating and it's unfair to hold the women responsible for their stupid choices.

I don't know why any woman would stay in a marriage after the man seeks a second wife. It's his way of telling her he wants a divorce without initiation it first.

 

[Gibiin-Udug]

Most men from any religious background would like a second wife. It's easier than cheating, something that many men do

Cheating and marriage are two different things.

 

[Duchess]

I don't know why any woman would stay in a marriage after the man seeks a second wife. It's his way of telling her he wants a divorce without initiation it first.

No, abaayo, he doesn't want a divorce. He wants to have the both of them so I'm more confused by women who willingly want to become a sister wife.

 

[Gibiin-Udug]

No, abaayo, he doesn't want a divorce. He wants to have the both of them so I'm more confused by a woman would willingly want to become a sister wife??

Low self esteem? A reformed round a way girl?

 

[Duchess]

Low self esteem? A reformed round a way girl?

Daddy issues, ugly duckling syndrome, low-key bicurious, former fatty, current fatty, divorcee who's mad at the world, the list goes on.

 

[Gibiin-Udug]

Daddy issues, ugly duckling syndrome, low-key bicurious, former fatty, current fatty, divorcee who's mad at the world, the list goes on.

In the closet lesbian, gap toothed, obese uneducated, single mother, a former ajnabi lover, there are endless possibilities as to why any sane woman would agree to be a second wife.

 

[Mckenzie]

Was secretly hoping @Duchess and @Reiko would finally disagree for once and let it get ugly quickly kmt who brought them back to their senses!

I think having a second wife in this environment is not the best move. We live in a world where we need to look after our kids a lot better and being an absent father or an extremely busy one will have crazy consequences

 

[Gibiin-Udug]

Was secretly hoping @Duchess and @Reiko would finally disagree for once and let it get ugly quickly kmt who brought them back to their senses!

Loooooooool


Never!!

 

[Jubba_Man]

It's in women's nature to rather share a high valued man than have a loser all to herself exclusively. A man wants to spread his seed as far as possible while a woman wants the genetic material of a successful and well regarded man. Sorry ladies, but it's biology. It is what it is.

 

[Bernie Madoff]

I wouldn't want second wife anyway. Rather just divorce her if stop being attracted to her

 

[Cognitivedissonance]

I don't know why any woman would stay in a marriage after the man seeks a second wife. It's his way of telling her he wants a divorce without initiation it first.

Stop being selfish. There's more women than men, don't you think those women need a man aswell miise do you expect them to become lesbians?

 

[Duchess]

Was secretly hoping @Duchess and @Reiko would finally disagree for once and let it get ugly quickly kmt who brought them back to their senses!

I think having a second wife in this environment is not the best move. We live in a world where we need to look after our kids a lot better and being an absent father or an extremely busy one will have crazy consequences

Haven't you noticed that I don't argue with other females?

It's in women's nature to rather share a high valued man than have a loser all to herself exclusively. A man wants to spread his seed as far as possible while a woman wants the genetic material of a successful and well regarded man. Sorry ladies, but it's biology. It is what it is.

Keep dreaming, Zanj.

 

[Bahal]

I disagree. If the man doesn't love his wife or if she let herself go and he's no longer attracted to her, then why not divorce her? This is nothing more than halal cheating and it's unfair to hold the women responsible for their stupid choices.

An inch from kufr

siilaanyolaugh

Polygamy sanctioned by Allah SWT is now cheating

siilaanyolaugh

 

[Duchess]

An inch from kufr

siilaanyolaugh

Polygamy sanctioned by Allah SWT is now cheating

siilaanyolaugh

There are ways to go about it. Marriages are not meant to be done in secret and hidden from the rest of the world. When it's done that way, it's haram, deceitful and the women feel cheated.

 

[Vision]

A man can marry upto 4 wives if he is able to be fair and just to them all. Everything he does for one he must do for all equaly. Meaning if he buys one a car, he must also buy it for the others. If he can do that, the first wife has no right to object him taking a 2nd 3rd or 4th wife just because she doesnt want him to marry others

 

[Siddhartha]

Thank you for seeing it from out point of view, when a somali woman wants to get married she treats him like a king bug after marriage comes all the headache arguments about bullshit untill you finally lose your mind and divorce her. As soon as science develops realistic vaginas the world population will drop alot.