i suggest you start disciplining yourself if you want to be able to raise your futur kids in the deen. And get to know yourself. How can you tame your nafs. it’s like a muscle that you need to train. But muslims neglect this part : The knowledge of yourself , self awareness , and keeping a pure heart. The knowledge of god as well (The most important). When you start learning about all of this it will be easy for you to control your haram activities. You won’t even have time or think about it. And it’s super beneficial. You will grow spiritually.