Why do somali parents zero expectation for their sons?

Lostbox

「Immortal Sage」| Qabil-fluid
VIP
As a parent. Most of my peer now are parents. Interestingly, this is not limited to just the somali community.

One thing they most have in common is
literally 0 expectations at home for their son. Like absolutely None. They don't take out the rubbish, or help with cooking, or even vacuum, or watch their siblings, or set the table, or wipe the counters, or make their beds, some dont clean after themselves. They just don't do any chores which is weird because almost every one of daughters has chores???

Why? I'm might be a little bias is I only have daughters but seriously though why?
 
Because of gender roles. They don't think it's suitable for a boy to be doing house chores, especially anything to do with the kitchen. Back home (I don't know if things are different now) men weren't allowed to enter the kitchen at all.

Every culture has its own ideas of what is masculine/feminine which then shapes gender expectations. Certain things like cooking/cleaning were seen as effeminate behaviour if a man did them which is why many parents didn't bother to teach their sons. Of course, every family is different and some were more strict about this than others.
 

El Nino

Cabsi cabsi
VIP
Allahumma Barik as you are now a father. To answer your question, it depends on the family.

You will have men like me disagree with you and vice versa. This is due to for some reason peoples circles being heavily different.

In my case, I would be yelled and often whooped if I did not do my share of the chores.
 

AbdiFreedom

Destroyer of Somnet|Trudeau4Prison|Invade Somalia
Staff Member
Families in Europe treat their daughters like garbage for some reason. Or maybe its because non-whites don't really integrate there. The only norms I have seen is the mother doing everything or both sexes of children doing their share.
 

Qeelbax

East Africa UNUKA LEH
VIP
Because of gender roles. They don't think it's suitable for a boy to be doing house chores, especially anything to do with the kitchen. Back home (I don't know if things are different now) men weren't allowed to enter the kitchen at all.

Every culture has its own ideas of what is masculine/feminine which then shapes gender expectations. Certain things like cooking/cleaning were seen as effeminate behaviour if a man did them which is why many parents didn't bother to teach their sons. Of course, every family is different and some were more strict about this than others.
so the gender roles only apply to the men? because you will never see a somali family telling a girl not to work, if anything it is expected.
 
As a parent. Most of my peer now are parents. Interestingly, this is not limited to just the somali community.

One thing they most have in common is
literally 0 expectations at home for their son. Like absolutely None. They don't take out the rubbish, or help with cooking, or even vacuum, or watch their siblings, or set the table, or wipe the counters, or make their beds, some dont clean after themselves. They just don't do any chores which is weird because almost every one of daughters has chores???

Why? I'm might be a little bias is I only have daughters but seriously though why?
Your question is wrong. It's matter of fact the opposite. Your question should be why have Somali parents failed in raising the male child. I have coined this term for this problem :fittytousand: I call it waalid khasaara.Waalid khasaara occurs in heavy populated Somali community or even in Somali ones. It's the failure of parents not educating their male child at a young age starting 2-15. After the age of 15 people start noticing this person is having problems and then those problems get massively bigger as they get old. It's not boy it's the parents it's called waalid khasaara
 
so the gender roles only apply to the men? because you will never see a somali family telling a girl not to work, if anything it is expected.

You're right. There are a lot of Somali girls who are the breadwinners of their family or they at least make significant financial contributions to the household. Ig the parents ignore the double standards here because they stand to benefit.
 
I thought u were gonna bring up how they dont monitor their sons..like they dont care how late he goes out and this is how they get in crime. Ive noticed they have a careless view of them cuz in their mind "he wont get pregnant so who cares" its idiotic and bites them at the end. Speaking of gender roles i agree with qeelbax they expect money from their daughters even tho thats not a traditional role. I will say though that my grandma from my dads side had mostly boys so she didnt wait to have a daughter she taught my dad and his brothers how to cook. Her daughters were the youngest of the family.
 
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