Qabiil is a cancer that will never leave us

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Doctor Osman, Good man, you are too good for the Qabiil obsessed Somalis honestly. Don't waste your emotions bro. You come across as too innocent and clueless, nice guy all around.
 

DR OSMAN

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Shaydhan is a vicious creature, it's not some figure or spirit. It is the arrogance and misguidance where humans try to figure god out with their brains or try to pray or perform any sort of actions for they feel what they give and do will satisfy god when god is the simplest he knows you got nothing to offer him, all he wants u to do is realise is that and humans will never realize due to our arrogance and thats how shaydhan sows people away from god. The hardest thing for a human being to do is to say I dont know or have the answer.

This good n evil is a tool of satan to confuse people into 'doing' things and saying things and trying to get them from saying 'allah i am limited and i have nothing and i surrender' good n evil is satan tools, lacnatallah alaykh. I had to meet satan and demons to finally find the answer for myself. Lacnatallah alaykh for he has fooled me for so long cuz he knows just like him im arrogant and want the answers by myself and will never bring myself to say I DONT KNOW, I SURRENDER. He uses good and evil and prayers and anything where u feel u r doing something and gets u away from saying U DONT KNOW.

Satan even comes in the form of a beautiful woman, he isnt just a monster sxb that u will run away from, he will appeal to your desires and obviously makes himself look attractive but his goal is to make u arrogant and get away from saying 'i surrender and nothing i do will ever help me with god'
 
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Those who have truly surrendered to allah are at peace cuz u know all ur efforts are pointless the only thing u have is surrender. The rests are chasing their tail basically and it's going nowhere and may god have mercy on them. Spiritual Islam will win hands down over your stupid physical acts. Your physical acts stay on this earth, your spirit goes to god. If your spirit is full of actions and deeds and no true submission, its fruitless your trying to earn your way to god and u will fall short. My deeds and actions are physical, my spirit is clean cuz its in total submission i figured out i cant do anything from myself for god good or bad. Now my physical aspect which is temporary is just going to be discarded in the end good or evil which is pointless.

I tried it all sxb, charity, being good, following prayers and all the deeds. Then tried using my brain and it kept heading into more loops and no ends and still felt empty inside cause there was no submission. Now there is submission everything else u realize is nothing. The shaydhan is pure arrogance and was misguiding me thinking i could do all these deeds and feel good, he wanted me to be arrogant like him and not surrendering myself and trying to bribe god thru my actions. Damn shaydhan lacnatallah alaykh.



Have you ever visited Somalia bro?
 

DR OSMAN

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Doctor Osman, Good man, you are too good for the Qabiil obsessed Somalis honestly. Don't waste your emotions bro. You come across as too innocent and clueless, nice guy all around.

I am not good person sxb, I have heaps of demons believe me, the strongest one for me my 'mind' and thoughts. It's vicious in there, but someone else demons might be his 'dick' or 'money'. I know my true weakness it's my thoughts and doubts constantly and why I need to travel in the future to end this or at least bring some sort of closure to the mind aspect. But I did the strongest thing i've ever done in my life sxb yet it was the easiest but I could never bring myself around to it before. It was pray, good deeds, charity, morals, laws, it was all me trying to do things in the physical sense, I got disillusioned with that and realized 'sxb i cant bribe my way to god' and started using my mind. And subhanallah it's another vicious demon that makes u want to 'figure out' god and you want to try logic, reasoning, experiments, but your talking about non physical thing it doesn't have a cause n effect it's not even physical.

So I realized when I was looking in this vicious architecture, and yes the world is an architecture that's how I VIEW it, doesn't mean that's how it is in reality. But in architecture sxb, the first rule before anything is done is a 'purpose', if you don't have a purpose for your architecture, it's just putting random pieces on the board constantly and it has no real meaning. That's why I found it so hard to figure out god, I was using architecture principles in the maze cause in architecture all u can do is add-delete-upgrade-replace-merge with the pieces on the board. So I viewed it with those principles and realized I am just heading into one maze of the architecture and it's a dead end constantly, it doesn't give me any purpose other then more of the same thing in different elements. Then I sat down and realized ok you need a purpose and if u don't find this the architecture is pointless, your just gonna be in a never ending maze.

While figuring out purpose I used all reason, logic, everything I possibly could and it all fell short then it hit me just out of blue, try it from another angle what if you just say 'you don't know the purpose' and accept that. Then it started to fall into place, the logic just streamed beautifully...If you don't know the purpose because how can u when it's not physical and based on the design rule it looks like there billions of galaxies just within our neighbourhood and that's just what our eye sees is the the last light basically, but it could stretch a-lot further so it's basically infinity sxb the architecture. So if the design is infinity you can assume the owner is infinity and how can someone inside the architecture who is finite or limited chase the infinite. U will be there all day it's like chasing a never ending rope and u will end up falling short continously like I was and scratching my damn head and in deep thought. Then I realized the logic can only work this way...the infinite must find the finite, I just have to sit in this frickin maze and pray for the infinite to find me, there is no other way.

So I settled that issue with god now, I realized I need to stop telling god what I think he is and just sit back and say 'ill let him decide who he is and ill accept that' and that's when it became clear to me good n evil is just chasing that endless rope it's more about you trying to find the answer within yourself and your acts when all u should do is sit back and surrender, god will do the rest. That's where Satan come in and deceives you with good n evil and makes u do these things for god so that u r arrogant like him and won't just accept submission. Funny huh how the simplest thing turns out to be the hardest. That's architecture rule, it has to be simple the second it gets complicated something is gone wrong.
 

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But this idea you have this complexity and yet missing the simplest rule a 'purpose' and then we need to accept there is no purpose, it's just madness and makes no sense at all. How can I say an architecture has no purpose behind it. How can I say we have all this life and then it just simply ends. The sad thing is, if it does end that's probably a good outcome. Imagine we were living in this maze forever just eating, sleeping, and doing the same thing over and over, the question of purpose will still boil into u. Now I say life is scary not death, cuz death is just a deep coma as atheists believe, it's the experiences that scare ppl and if there is an experience after this world, that scares me more then anything and hence why I have faith, it's a faith grounded in the fear I will have to keep existing with no purpose, that's what my faith is grounded it, it's not grounded in for the fear of death as death is just so easy.

You don't have an architecture like this with such a simple outcome. Anyways, I decided everything good n evil and anything physical will be thrown out and left behind including love which is a need. We must strip ourselves of all this when talking to god or we may just get what we wish for and not true satisfication and the reason that happens is cause there is no purpose, once there is purpose there is completeness, it doesnt matter if your in hell even your satisfied. I mean seriously what better way is there for satan to fool humanity then use god and then make them forget to submit and chase the rope like they are self-sufficient in finding the answer when we know we are limited and chasing a never-ending rope, u will just go into a strange place with that never ending rope but it's not god. I will sit there and just say i dropped it all god, i knew it was an illusion and shits n giggles, now lets talk on your terms, u find me cuz i cant find you.

The only thing satan has on me is not evil but good. Once I can realize I will leave behind all the things I loved, that's the hardest thing not the things u hated. But I divided the spheres and now in an acceptance stage that I don't wanna leave my family and friends the things that are closet to you, those are the sort of demons im gonna be battling. But not the actual good and bad deeds anymore, I don't believe in spiritual deeds only physical deeds within our earth yes but its only between me and you as human beings, i will never say it's for god subhanallah, its like me trying to prove myself to god or working a deal out or something. Acuudi billah, lacnatallah alaykh shaydhan and he still makes me sometimes think like this, his only objective is for u to forget the simplest thing submission with no baggage or trading or earning, just total and utter submission and say that's all i got and no human will ever bring himself to that conclusion, it took me years to get to that stage.

Salafism is dead sxb, Christianity is about salvation and love its more rope chasing they wont let love go, see it's their image of god their chasing, they just cant bring themselves to say 'i surrender on gods terms' without any image or desire or need or descriptions of god I have. I think it's the biggest satan, he is using that one thing all humans desire the most 'love'. But love without a purpose is pointless, can u be in love for eternity, its a need and satan is all about needs, desires, etc, he just wants u to go to god and say i never wanted u for who u r by who u say u r, not on your terms, i want u on my terms is basically their faith AND that is the arrogance satan has put in them. Judaism is just as bad, more proving themselves thru laws on earth. Islam is correct sxb the theme of submission then it gets corrupted as times goes on with interpretation and ends up dead again.

If I didn't know about islam submission part, I would never of found the correct answer. It would've been more rope chasing like searching for love, searching for proving yourself to god thru your acts like judaism. Luckily not all of islam is lost but majority of is gone but the submission part thanksfully is still there.

Spirituality is a nasty topic but u need to do it sxb, you cant find yourself if you don't and it can take a long time and I am sure I have other demons like I said I need conquering. Flirt with all different faiths, disbelief, belief, religions. Read them, for thru doubt will come 'sincere' truth.
 
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DR OSMAN

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But I must be honest, I had a huge disaster in my life with health matters and realized the limitations of rationality, doctors, family, everyone I realized that I used to put my faith in, none could stop my disaster. Vicious place to be and I realized the limitations of the brain, yes we need to use but use it solely only, no. I am now getting in contact with my emotions it's another tool, nothing should be neglected sxb. But spirituality was a nightmare, I hope the other aspects of me will be easier now.
 

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Don't worry about the qabyalad, it's only done for fun sxb, it's emotional stuff waxani, it's not serious talk but we need to sometimes relax n chill also. Something I need to put focus on, I have a problem, if I get going, I go hard and then stop and get low again and then high and charging and then low again. I need to deal with alot of things but alhamdulilah the spiritual part is settled. I think thats what affected my motivation and mental and emotional stability across my life. It's cause I know there was no direction there and it was just hear-say, i must of had that gap where i felt something is missing here and there is no direction, where the f*ck am i heading and I think this rolled over onto my physical and emotional states. Now I got that direction sorted out, I think the rest is gonna fall into place pretty easily.

But I look at things from outcome perspective, if u know the outcome, you can work out the best route. But if there is no outcome or direction, your heading nowhere and repeating the wheel constantly. But if you know an outcome, you can start working out how to get it done competently and the easiest possible manner while realizing risk factors and I am conservative with risk so I plan around that.
 

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I'll be engraving on my tombstone, no1 wake up this occupant if there is no purpose. If all u guys are doing eating, sleeping, shitting, and materialism and if u have ever-lasting life and there is no death for u, please dont wake me up i love my comatose state with nothingness but if there is something spiritually god u know im ready for the next ride but no more wants/needs/desires/emotional crap real 'purpose' means the end of all those things.

Cuz I know life with no purpose is satan now, its not deeds, acts, materials, love, happiness, all those things are desires that need keep refueling but that emptiness of purpose will always be there cuz GOD AINT THERE. Where-as satan made u forget the purpose which is what brings u to god not the materialistic stuff. Go buy a new car, u will love it for maybe a few years with satan by your side but then u will hate it again, it's the same for anything on this earth and where satan roams, but if u with god im pretty sure its better then this existence.

So now I come from a perspective...life is satan, death is the path to get out of satans hold unless u hold onto satan which is life and put faith into god with none of ya terms but on his terms and dont describe it either or imagine it yourself or your feeding your own ego more satan. I imagine satan is sitting there sxb through-out all life in the good and bad side and saying 'hahahah' fools and then when they die he is sitting there again and says welcome to my world and your back in his clutches again cuz u refuse to say the simplest thing ' i submit no conditions nor will i use anything in my life to negiotate with god but surrender totally'.

Religion is to illustrate point and then god uses examples that u can relate to. Who said for u to copy the examples and forget the point, remember satan is misguiding u from the point of submission and wants u to do the example more 'works' more 'deeds' more 'answers from yourself' when u forgot the whole key point of the religion which is just to submit. Satan attacks even in religion sxb. If u wanna do all those things its fine but its only for yourself never forget that, it's not for god or your tryin to deal with god thru your actions again and satan has u by the balls again. If u dont wanna pray or fast you dont have too your settled with god and submitted, cuz everything else about yourself only and how u handle it is up to u. But that submission part regardless if its missing if ur good or bad by society standards it wont matter. Hitler if he submitted and did all those things is fine by god compared to the salafist imam who works and tries to negiotate with god by himself. No1 can beat submission no amount of work u do, cuz this guy dropped the arrogance which is satan key feature he knows he cant answer or give anything to an infinite power. He bows and waits for god to rescue him even if he didnt do one good deed in his life, he is a damn saint of god.

Christianity is the most deceptive of faiths. It starts with a simple message of u need a savior which is god and turns into all these vicious details of your sinner. It's attempting u reconcile with god like your cutting a deal again and ur doing it cause u want something called love out of it which I told u is an earthly desire, its something we have but attribute it to god and then chase that image of the god we created. Where-as islam even tells u never imagine god for u will chase an idol of your ego not the true god.
 
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DR OSMAN

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The sooner the ummah realizes good n evil is all satan, the better it is for islam. For satan uses both tools and the objective is to make u forget the submission part cuz that will eliminate all the arrogance of satan from within u. He then forces ur attention to finding the answer within your prayers and making u do things over n over again so he gets u to a point where u feel you have to exchange your deeds with god like it's a business transaction. It's arrogance of the worst order sxb to refuse u got nothing to give allah and u r the limtied one and u r the one who needs rescuing.
 
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