Should Somalis adopt the concept of arranged marriage?
- Thread starter empressjamila
- Start date
ok what about pakistanis and Moroccans why do they marry cousins because no one wont marry them?
Pakistanis and some arabs go for it out of choice
Xoxoxo
VIP
Probably because they willingly do it and aren’t outcasted in their own country or among their fellow citizens like *Ehum* US.
Pakistanis and Arabs don’t have a minority group that has no other choice but to marry each other to survive. They did it willingly we had no choice but.
not true cadcads do it just like pakistanis and arabs do
Well I would love a nice cadcad/reer xamar or barwani girl they hot asf
But was always told don’t bother they only marry themselves.
Sheeet I’ve been missing out
But was always told don’t bother they only marry themselves.
Sheeet I’ve been missing out
Nilotic
VIP
What if the cousins in question are 10/10s?
I look like my community focused father, so there's been a number of occasions I've been embarrassed after I tried to hit up a beautiful woman only to have her say "hi, cousin"
..It's mortifying when they then reveal that your grandfathers were brothers -- making you feel like the biggest degenerate in the world; I don't know how those desert living, hairy, unibrow having people do it.
Kmt at ppl promoting marrying ur cousin lol
The issue is that cultures in which arrange marriages are high also have a culture of stigmatizing divorce.... particularly divorced and even widowed women. The marriages don't work because of arranged marriages, they work because those that dare to leave the marriages are socially ostracized. India probably has the worst domestic violence and bride murders in the world. This is a nation that historically used to practise Seti, which is widow burning. Upon the death of the husband, his wife will also be killed.
Therefore, their pride in being/having the lowest divorce rates comes at the expense of people's lives, happiness and health. Also, as you can see their social issues are immense. We can see it now due to social media.
In saying that, I agree with arranged marriages in which children get to also choose. Parents can introduce likeminded children from good families to their children and they'll be at peace of mind that the person they've introduced their child to is and was similarly raised in a family like theirs with the values they think are important.
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That type of arranged marriages are great. I think us Somalis need to start being a bit more proactive. Example, if you have a son and your best friend who you know has a daughter raised similarly to the way you raised your children, then of course introducing them would be a great idea. They'll probably get along and have similar family values.
However, to the people idealising Pakistanis and Indians... This is not right. Many have toxic relationships that chip away at someones mental and physical health. High rates of female abuse and even murder at times. They also have a lot more family drama compared to Somalis.
At the end of the day, high divorce rates are bad. However divorce is still a mercy as the reason why Allah has allowed us to divorce is to avoid even more haram and toxic situations that are found a lot more in Asian households.
Moderation is key.
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Moderation is not compatible with human nature
Lol it is. I think you'll find our deen is one of moderation.Moderation is not compatible with human nature
Example: divorcing isn't seen as necessarily a good thing, but it is a mercy from Allah therefore it might be seen as the best course of action in some situations.
Not being moderate in your approach to many situations is what causes a lot of human suffering.
Humans generally find it challenging to be moderate regardless of the beliefs or values they profess. If most of us were actually moderate, global hunger wouldn't be an issue.
I know, they take it overboard and don't look at the full picture or use critical thinking.
Look at this thread. It seems to me many think its either timo jilic style arrangements which isn't healthy vs Western style ways of getting into relationships which also isn't great.
A more moderate approach to life is accepting that divorce happens, in fact it even happens to the best of us. It happened to even some Sahabas. But being proactive and family and friends should try to introduce spouses to young adults so that people can marry like minded individuals to hopefully lessen the rates. It's simple as that.
Djokovic
Somali Arab
u probably support khaniis people but u are against cousin marriage interesting
The alchemist
VIP
A billion-dollar idea, set up an Amazon-type algorithm to arrange people with different traits through engagement with the system that can spit out fitting pairs. "A better job than your momma" is the company motto. Totally separate value proposition from the matchmaking companies.
reer
VIP
Isku hishood warya. Adeerka oo sheega.@Angelina why the qashin?
