Father of 16 children and husband of three wives. Quran teacher at day and taxi driver by night. Baidoa SWS.

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Some see the error. I'm afraid it is the majority who don't, based on the things I read on this thread.

They just want to be 'Laandheer', at all costs.
With no regard for all the hungry babies. Pure xaasidnimo.

Somali babies deserve more than to be crammed in a hot jiingad. Meanwhile the guys advocating for this, are in comfortable, spacious rooms, uu fiirsada.

 

[Yaraye]

They encourage this behaviour and the only gender that takes issue with our response, is the same gender that suffers most from having a polygamous father who is not wealthy.

Men are inherently selfish creatures. Many don't care deeply for their children/wife. If this shit wasn't shamed in non-madow/african communities you'd see more of them act like Xoolo too. Therefore shaming, stigmatizing and ostracizing is where it needs to begin. Men care about other men's opinion. They don't want to look bad in front of them.

 

[Netflix]

Mothers are supposed to stay up all night to care for their infants and breastfeed them, and we still applaud them for it. Imagine how cruel it would be if I looked at a mother who did this and said "she doesn't deserve to be applauded, this is what she's supposed to do. She did this to herself by having children"???

This man works himself to the bone day and night for his family, of course we will praise him. You people in this thread are blaming him for Somalia's disfunction, but in fact if every man in Somalia had his work ethic, Somalia would be very far ahead.

The guy is doing what he can. Back there, unemployment is high, and social mobility is low. Locals rarely make it. Although he shouldn't have had that many children, I'm sure the extended family helps out. Not the end of the world. I got a relative like this (14 kids), and we help him. Don't get me twisted, though. My relative is still an idiot to me.

 

[AdoonkaAlle]

Does the article only focus on SD? Or also other aspects of marriage? SD is only one part of marriage and why are you only focusing on that?

I focused on it as it’s the most significant from my point of view & also to give an emphasis on just how unreliable the conclusion drawn from the survey is. A casual reading of the article gives the impression of a very problematic conclusion yet by looking at the breakdown from the data results the differences claimed are hardly significant to warrant the level of scrutiny given to polygamous unions.

The participants were asked to complete three questionnaires: The Female Sexual Function Index (FSFI), the Rosenberg Self-Esteem Scale (RSE), and the Brief Symptom Inventory-18 (BSI-18). Then from here they performed some statistical analysis making comparisons etc. All
the while taking note of participants income level, education, setting (urban/rural) etc.

In the above table we read that polygamous women overall have higher BSI scores but a lower RSE score but are these differences really that significant to warrant the focus on polygamous marriages ? Even more surprising is that when BSI scores of monogamous women are compared to polygamous women who are third & fourth wives, the latter have less anxiety & depression as opposed to monogamous women. There's more variation within polygamous women and depending on which factor/parameter you chose to compare with monogamous the results also vary but again the differences still aren't that much.

This is why i'm very skeptical about the conclusions, reliability and usefulness gathered from such surveys etc.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

The guy is doing what he can. Back there, unemployment is high, and social mobility is low. Locals rarely make it. Although he shouldn't have had that many children, I'm sure the extended family helps out. Not the end of the world. I got a relative like this (14 kids), and we help him. Don't get me twisted, though. My relative is still an idiot to me.

Exactly,

The financial burden goes to other people! And if he dies, gets sick (Allah forbid) YOU are on the hook for his 14 children.
This means less money for YOUR children.

A lot of Somalis have less disposable income thanks to these kind of males.

 

[CABDULWALI XASAN.]

If he was raising 16 orphans, sure. But he brought 16 kids into abject poverty which is why he must have 2 jobs.

How do you know that? their quality of living relative to where they live could be good better then you Arguing about the family size of another Happy family in somalia

 

[CABDULWALI XASAN.]

I see the only way your arguement even work is making the Craziest assumptions and pulling information out of no where, Cramming 16 kids in a small Sheet Metal house is obviously wrong but do you know that? Do you have trauma from this??

Exactly,

The financial burden goes to other people! And if he dies, gets sick (Allah forbid) YOU are on the hook for his 14 children.
This means less money for YOUR children.

A lot of Somalis have less disposable income thanks to these kind of males.

Sounds a little to personal

 

[chronic]

So this how our population is exploding

 

[Abu Hesi]

Of course he has to work, he did this to himself.
I find it hilarious when men want to be applauded for doing things they are supposed to do. How else will 19 people + him, eat, if he doesn't have 2 jobs.

Children deserve more than the bare minimum. They deserve the best, and they deserve parents that recognise that.

Of course I applaud him, waayo there others like him who don't even have jobs and married to multiple wives oo lasoo biilo.

The only reason you are against this guy is because of polygamy; even if he was filthy rich, you would still hate on him. This has nothing to do with money, but everything to do with your ideology and philosophy.

 

[Celery]

He says the youths should hear his story and learn a lesson

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Of course I applaud him, waayo there others like him who don't even have jobs and married to multiple wives oo lasoo biilo.

The only reason you are against this guy is because of polygamy; even if he was filthy rich, you would still hate on him. This has nothing to do with money, but everything to do with your ideology and philosophy.

It is not polite or fair to put words in my mouth.
I believe wealthy and honest men, are the only ones who should get access to polygamy. I am driven by the need to protect the children. Nothing else.

 

[Abu Hesi]

It is not polite or fair to put words in my mouth.
I believe wealthy and honest men, are the only ones who should get access to polygamy. I am driven by the need to protect the children. Nothing else.

Ok, Ustadh Hassan Wajidi has four wives and over 20 kids, he is the teacher to all of his kids and wives; He is also wealthy.

If the thread was about him, you girls would still complain about polygamy.

 

[Celery]

If this was outlawed by the government, so many people would scream it’s unislamic, meaning we’re stuck with this degeneracy for the foreseeable future. This guy is a net negative on the society.

Not only this but he’s busy depriving other peoples kids of any useful life skills by repeating Quran over and over to them. They’re better off learning plumbing or welding.

Net negative human

 

[AdoonkaAlle]

I doubt anyone believes Somalia is poor due to polygamy. I’m sure people here are saying poor men marrying again is contributing to even more poverty for women and children and that’s been recorded in many SSA countries. You find this phenomenon in many madow countries Somalia included, since polygamous unions amongst Arabs and Asians is lower than Africans, especially amongst the lower/working classes.

If people didn't believe that why bring it up ? i mean you were entertaining that idea yourself as to why our country is poverty stricken and backwards. Like i stated earlier there's a difference in claiming that some polygamous unions due to lack of accountability etc lead to poverty etc but my point is why this focus on polygamy when they don't constitute a majority or even half of monogamous unions. Poverty resulting from polygamous marriages is way less than that resulting from monogamous marriages simply due to numbers. There are far more poor women, children etc from monogamous marriages than those from polygamous marriages.

Poor monogamous men simply outnumber poor polygamous men by a very large margin yet why are people not making the link between poor monogamous men and a country's poverty ? what gives ? The only reason i can think of why people would go to such lengths is their hatred & disdain for polygamous men, poverty argument is an after thought

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

Ok, Ustadh Hassan Wajidi has four wives and over 20 kids, he is the teacher to all of his kids and wives; He is also wealthy.

If the thread was about him, you girls would still complain about polygamy.

I have no problem with wealthy polygamists. In fact, go to all the threads pertaining polygamy and you'll see that the vast majority of women take issue with broke polygamy, treacherous polygamy and so forth.

 

[Netflix]

Exactly,

The financial burden goes to other people! And if he dies, gets sick (Allah forbid) YOU are on the hook for his 14 children.
This means less money for YOUR children.

A lot of Somalis have less disposable income thanks to these kind of males.

IIRC my aunt paid for his mehr. Ridiculous stuff. It even seemed impressive to my mother at first. In my experience, older Somalis tend to think more is better. Both men and women. Could just be my experience and not typical, idk. But that's what I've noticed.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

The choice is simple;

1. Only wealthy men should be polygamous

VS​

2. Who cares, let any broke man bring children into abject poverty and misery.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

IIRC my aunt paid for his mehr. Ridiculous stuff. It even seemed impressive to my mother at first. In my experience, older Somalis tend to think more is better. Both men and women. Could just be my experience and not typical, idk. But that's what I've noticed.

It's true. I've been back home, and my broke male relatives with a lot of children, are praised.
Because back home, every boy is a future warrior for the family/clan, and since there is no government, our qabiil is our government.
This is why polygamy will go back to being a wealthy man's game, when Somalia becomes a normal country again. Because hardly any LITERATE girl or woman in her right mind, is signing up to be no.2 for a broke man.

 

[𐒁𐒚𐒒𐒂𐒘𐒂𐒗 𐒎𐒚𐒗𐒗𐒒]

If this was outlawed by the government, so many people would scream it’s unislamic, meaning we’re stuck with this degeneracy for the foreseeable future. This guy is a net negative on the society.

Not only this but he’s busy depriving other peoples kids of any useful life skills by repeating Quran over and over to them. They’re better off learning plumbing or welding.

Net negative human

Muslim countries that care about their people have laws such as pre-marital councelling, financial background checks, laws that stipulate wives must be informed about polygamy.
STD tests etc, etc. Because they know this rampant, broke and deceitful polygamy is a recipe for societal collapse.

To give you an example, in the developed world, boys from low-income families are more likely to get into crime. In Somalia, if studies were done, I bet we'd find the same results. Even scarier, they would seek out easy income by joining terror organisations.

"The longer a young person lives in poverty the more likely they are to engage in delinquent behaviour" .

They see people living the good life on Tiktok, so, they'll think to rob the eedo next door, and get a new phone.

As if these kids give a damn that their father is 'laandhere' or works 2 jobs. They'll be rightfully pissed off at having to share that with 3 other families. On top of that, since aabbo is working 2 jobs and migrating from one house to another, does he even have time to figure out which kid is depressed, or on the verge of becoming a criminal? It's all sad and sick.

 

[AdoonkaAlle]

You don't know me or what I do with my time. And the very fact that you act like these are rare cases is enough for me to disregard everything else you say. The truth is not within you or even next door to you.

Waad saxsantahay as i don't know you or what you do with your time and can only make judgments based on what i see from your interactions here in ss. It's because of that i can make assumptions on what i observe, people engage themselves passionately about things that matter to them the most, given the fact that the societal issues that affect your tol, reer etc why is it that you've never started threads about helping those who're less fortunate from your gobol etc

The characteristics you display is similar to those from, galmudug, hirshabeel, SWS, jubaland. somaliland, ssc etc, there's hardly any positive change you lot bring to your respective qabils other than degrade each other, you don't help the needy & poor of your tol, qabil etc. Consistently attack and use innocent people to score qabil points so as to show how strong you are

Like i said all of this is based on observation and there's always the chance you're displaying another persona while online laakin based on my experience of people that i know in real life who act like you do from my qaabil, tol the chances of me being right about you is higher than the opposite.