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What did she say for him to say that? Is it possible they are both in the wrong? Why would a man say something like that unless you emasculated him in some way?
all that from her saying i dissagree its clear who has an overinflated ego lmaoOf course you will disagree, victim complex, overinflated ego, delusions of grandeur laced with ridiculous self importance.
That's why I advice any sane intelligent male not to marry these thin skinned diaspora females, walking homewreckers, destroyers of society.
In the old days, females had thicker skin than males, also more patience as it related to household matters and family, but now even the lowest of the lowest male has more than the average diaspora female.
Rendering a poor girl fatherless from such a young age because the mothers feelings got hurt in a heated argument, pathetic, really pathetic beyond belief.
Those women of old had arranged marriages and you could excuse them unlike these that get to pick, choose and date the guy for years before marrying him regardless family opposition, taking no responsibility or any personal accountability, typical diaspora xaalimo.
No surprise they suffer the most in comparison to other races, that's the price homewreckers pay
I support two-parent, stable homes, but each situation is unique, and we donβt know the specific reasons behind her decision, particularly what may have led up to it. Likely, it wasnβt a single statement but an accumulation of invalidations over time.Our Prophet (PBUH) had martial issues, this idea of problem free marriage is the actual disease that broke the camels back.
You expect and accept conflicts, you expect and accept the thousands cuts, you expect and accept the ups and downs, that's how you learn the greatest qualities in life which are patience and peserverance, which leads to growth, contenment and wisdom.
Imagine your mother making you fatherless over a stupid heated argument for which your father earnestly apologised?
Imagine all the psychological, emotional, social trauma it would have caused you, the longterm effects on your future relationship? all because of her flimsy ever wavering ego? with no regard for her children future and well being?
It's no wonder why the devil loves divorce more than other henious crimes like murder and fornication, because its a death spiral that destroys the vary foundation of society.
There is nothing poetic about her post, she is not a problem solver, in fact she is part and parcel of that malignant disease that loves to wreck homes, that loves to destroy rather than build and loves to desecrate that which is sacred.
At what point do you hold these women accountable? there was no arranged marriage, there was no force, the candidates were not predetermined, she picked out of her own volition, they dated for months and years before marrying.
Whatever negative you have to say about him reflects even more poorely on her, what happened to riding out the consequence of your actions? what happened to thinking about more than yourself? like the well being of your children? disappointed to see you support this reckless homewrecking.
I support two-parent, stable homes, but each situation is unique, and we donβt know the specific reasons behind her decision, particularly what may have led up to it. Likely, it wasnβt a single statement but an accumulation of invalidations over time.
Relationships are complex, and the idea of 'riding out' a marriage doesnβt universally apply, especially in situations involving harm or ongoing disrespect. As @Journey pointed out, some Somali women find themselves in relationships where they shoulder most of the load due to emotionally or physically absent husbands, what they call married single mothers. While fathers are certainly important, they arenβt the only stabilizing force, and not all fulfill this role well. Iβm fortunate to have a well-adjusted father Alx, but even he acknowledges that many menβacross all backgrounds struggle to lead as reliable patriarchs.
Accountability in marriage is shared. If one partner is causing repeated harm, expecting the other to endure it indefinitely is unrealistic, especially at the cost of their well-being or the stability of their children.
For many, divorce is a last resort and a weighty decision. Reducing a womanβs choice to leave a harmful relationship (including emotional harm) to a 'flimsy ego' overlooks the complexity involved in making such a decision.
While divorce can affect children, so too can remaining in a toxic or dysfunctional marriage. Ideally, both partners would seek support to reconcile issues, but when harm is involved, Islam permits divorce for a reason. Itβs not ideal, but sometimes itβs necessary for peace and stability.
all that from her saying i dissagree its clear who has an overinflated ego lmao
You brought the 25% figure not me, divorce has never been as rife as it is today and to argue it was is simply false and shows your out of touch with reality.Exactly
You need to stop talking about days of βoldβ since divorce rates were high in the late 1800s to even the mid 20th century according to the locals themselves. One tribe had a divorce rate of 25% and that was the mid century. Certain North Western Tribes did have a lower divorce than the rest, but on average divorce was frequent and this was observed not just by outsiders but our ancestors themselves, who even pointed out that certain regions were worse.
Right now as well, divorce rates are high back home as well, so your rant against Western Somali women is inaccurate and laced with emotions and itβs an indication of your unbridled feelings towards women raised in the diaspora. When the divorce rates are just as high if not worse back home in which itβs common to see a young lady who hasnβt even reached 25 has married at least two times, you cannot put the divorce issue with regards to Somalis at the feet of Western Somali women.
If youβre are going to write a rant about βdays of oldβ at least make it accurate. Itβs romanticized hogwash that doesnβt reflect what was happening on the ground and what is currently happening in the motherland.
If you donβt believe me, I have enough evidence since Iβm an avid reader of history and Iβll happily send you the link of a post that compiles this.
We canβt have a rose tinted perspective of history and bash women over something that never was. A mere fantasy of the over emotional male filled with malice towards the opposite gender. Letβs stick to facts and accuracy please.
You clearly haven't read the first post of the OP, he didn't kick her out, she left on her own volition which is actually against Islam.So he told her βItβs not your houseβ when she was most likely the one who made the house a home, as wives tend to do. And proceeded to kick her out in the middle of the night where anything could have happened to her.
Wow. What a trash husband and a trash human being. Complete dameer. She should never go back.
Yeah I agree that diasporan Somalis should marry out and assimilate in to their respective host countries that they reside in, instead of continuing this painful existence of qabyaaladnimo iyo foodhoYou don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Heβs a misogynist that expects women to grin and bear it and heβs been here for years and this has been his shtick.You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
Probably has to be the silliest point. If people had to persevere though the consequences of their choice, divorce wouldnβt halal. You also donβt seem to have the understanding that a toxic relationship is worse and sometimes leads to even more issues for you and the children than divorce. No one thinks people should separate over something small, but you seem to think that people should stay no matter what,Your father and mother had plenty of major arguments much worse than "this is my house respect me" wether you know about it or not, but they persevered through it.
In those days it was mostly arranged marriages unlike today, at what point are you going to hold these women accountable?
They picked their own partners, dated them for months and years often against the advice of family, birds of a feather flock together, whatever bad they say about him reflects even worse on her as she is the one that picked him.
What happened to perseverance through the consequences of your own actions ?
Youβre out of touch with history and have a romanticized version. Youβre crying about women leaving due to arguments and toxicity, but what about the men of old you look up to who divorced to make way for a younger wife which even shocked foreigners?I didn't think you too embraced perpetual victimhood
She supports home wrecking and making a poor girl fatherless, while I support the opposite, but of course in your deranged delusional world what she is doing is good, because you have the same predisposition to destroy rather than build.
You brought the 25% figure not me, divorce has never been as rife as it is today and to argue it was is simply false and shows your out of touch with reality.
Side note: youβre jumbling a lot of things together. These girls that grew up In fatherless homes are the daughters of Boomers and Gen X who arenβt diaspora women but women who were mostly raised back home but came to the West as married women. Many of them also has arranged marriages.Go and speak to the masjid boards responsible for matrimonials, speak to football and basketball coaches that train large group of young males, speak to youth club leaders, speak to community leaders, even the those female lead agree.
He'll even speak to the countless females raised in fatherless homes, it's an absolute pandemic we are talking 75% divorce figures if not worse.
Even the Non Muslims haven't gone as low as we have, your clearly out of touch with reality so there is no point even continuing this discussion.
It's been over a decade now and I have yet to come across a case were the male wanted divorce and the wife wanted to save the marriage, or even a case of mutual divorce, it's always the xaalimos that want it, this is of course universal it's not just xaalimos, but they are far worse then the rest.
There is no accountability and responsibility in your post just pure victimhood, unlike the history your so fixated with, the diaspora xaalimo's gets to pick their own husbands with the unprecedented opportunity to date him for months or years before marrying him, something unheard of in history.
But you want us to believe that they are all just innocent, bad at choosing their own partners, and that all of these males are just terrible, hence they are justified to be homewreckers.
They select, they choose to date, they choose to marry them, than they choose to divorce them, unprecedented power that is used to destroy rather build.
You clearly haven't read the first post of the OP, he didn't kick her out, she left on her own volition which is actually against Islam.
Even if he divorced her, they have to stay together in the same house until the iddah period expires, he is not allowed to kick her out nor is she allowed to leave.
This is basic Islam, but because of your emotional rage, and predisposition to home wrecking, youβre incapable to even discern the basics, or even comprehend the basics facts of her message.
Your conflating too many things together, couples that are persevering Vs lunatic diaspora xaalimo that wreck their homes over nothing.You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.