Why do Halimos act like their life would end or its such a bad thing if their husband marries anther woman?

[Angelina]

There are women open to polygamy but they don’t seek out those women. They want to force it upon those who don’t want that lifestyle for some odd reason.

More than anything, I hate it when they make it seem that a woman who doesn't want to be in a polygamous marriage is somehow less of a good Muslim than a woman who is okay with being in one.

We have options not to, and anyone with conmon sense understands that jealousy is the main factor for women which is natural. Some are able to overcome it and some cannot and therefore do not want to be tested this way. As long as you do not make the halal haram, you are well within your rights to prefer being in a monogamous marriage

 

[Angelina]

This is quite BIZARRE tbh. Seems like I'm being taught today that women feel jealous when their husband marries another wife....



I would urge you to be less offensive when you're having a discussion with someone. Sometimes you come off as hardcore Misandrist with deep disdain and hatred for men.

I have no issues with you. But i am offended that you made it seem that I am trying to make the haram halal and comparing female adultury to halal polygamy. I was merely talking about the feeling.

Tbh, this whole thread is bizarre along with many men who love to ask this question. The answer as to why many women do not want to be in a polygamous relationship is due to jealousy. If the OP and other men know this, why do they ask this question?

I'm not a misandrist. I just hate illogical sexist men. Whilst this question isn't really sexist, the OP has a history of making horrible remarks.

 

[Nafiso Qalanjo]

Marry a women who is open to polygamy. Problem solved.

 

[Mercury]

I have no issues with you. But i am offended that you made it seem that I am trying to make the haram halal and comparing female adultury to halal polygamy. I was merely talking about the feeling.

Tbh, this whole thread is bizarre along with many men who love to ask this question. The answer as to why many women do not want to be in a polygamous relationship is due to jealousy. If the OP and other men know this, why do they ask this question?

I'm not a misandrist. I just hate illogical sexist men. Whilst this question isn't really sexist, the OP has a history of making horrible remarks.

keep in mind the OP have said that he would hide his wives from another now hes asking why women hate polygamy the question is why he seek out women who are against polygamy

 

[IstarZ]

More than anything, I hate it when they make it seem that a woman who doesn't want to be in a polygamous marriage is somehow less of a good Muslim than a woman who is okay with being in one.

We have options not to, and anyone with conmon sense understands that jealousy is the main factor for women which is natural. Some are able to overcome it and some cannot and therefore do not want to be tested this way. As long as you do not make the halal haram, you are well within your rights to prefer being in a monogamous marriage

Don’t forget she is also selfish for leaving her sister in Islam without a husband

I don’t think polygamy is the actual issue but it’s the lack of maturity and sensitivity when it comes to this topic that’s an issue.

 

[Rooble44]

Women can be short-sighted by their overwhelming emotions, when your husband is married to another woman, you get breaks from him, get help with the children, have time for yourself, and apparently the slight jealousy can create a healthy competition and even spice up your sex life.

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He's a friend of a friend but I've been invited over to his house once and I see him around town sometimes with his wives, as well as seeing him in the mosque. I've never seen the brother upset, he's always happy and smiling mashallah. Both of his wives seem happy with each other too.

 

[so_wavey]

keep in mind the OP have said that he would hide his wives from another now hes asking why women hate polygamy the question is why he seek out women who are against polygamy

You shouldnt be against polygamy though subhanallah you cant be against something allah made halal

 

[so_wavey]

Don’t forget she is also selfish for leaving her sister in Islam without a husband

I don’t think polygamy is the actual issue but it’s the lack of maturity and sensitivity when it comes to this topic that’s an issue.

Women are shortsighted they let the jealousy cloud the good things about polygamy yes i can understand some women may not want it actually all women dont its just some accept allah's decree and think about the kids future instead of going mad and destroying a childs future without no dad.

 

[Lostbox]

Because there was a shocking discovery about women. You wouldn't believe what they found

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Can you believe that?

 

[Angelina]

Don’t forget she is also selfish for leaving her sister in Islam without a husband

I don’t think polygamy is the actual issue but it’s the lack of maturity and sensitivity when it comes to this topic that’s an issue.

I think the selfish comment takes the cake. In many polygamous marriages i've seen, the wives rarely benefit due to the lack of wisdom and self-centered attitude of the husband.

The problem isn't polygamy, lets put that to the side. The real issue is that many men only seem to care about the privileges as qawamah of the family and never about the massive responsibilities that comes with it. They enter marriages only thinking about what the wife has to do for them, and never what they have to do for her. They think she has to make him happy, but never that he too has to make her happy.

If many men took their role as qawamah seriously, we would not be seeing broke men trying to marry a 2nd time. Men using their wife's wealth to marry. Men treating their 2nd as a side chick. 1st wives being sectioned because of shock ect. All of this happens time and time again and it makes you think, where is their essense of being protectors and providers?

 

[vanilla]

it depends.... if hes macaan, is only fair that we share

 

[Hali]

I think the selfish comment takes the cake. In many polygamous marriages i've seen, the wives rarely benefit due to the lack of wisdom and self-centered attitude of the husband.

The problem isn't polygamy, lets put that to the side. The real issue is that many men only seem to care about the privileges as qawamah of the family and never about the massive responsibilities that comes with it. They enter marriages only thinking about what the wife has to do for them, and never what they have to do for her. They think she has to make him happy, but never that he too has to make her happy.

If many men took their role as qawamah seriously, we would not be seeing broke men trying to marry a 2nd time. Men using their wife's wealth to marry. Men treating their 2nd as a side chick. 1st wives being sectioned because of shock ect. All of this happens time and time again and it makes you think, where is their essense of being protectors and providers?

There was a guy that referred to his first as the main thing and the second as the side shocking

 

[Angelina]

Women can be short-sighted by their overwhelming emotions, when your husband is married to another woman, you get breaks from him, get help with the children, have time for yourself, and apparently the slight jealousy can create a healthy competition and even spice up your sex life.

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He's a friend of a friend but I've been invited over to his house once and I see him around town sometimes with his wives, as well as seeing him in the mosque. I've never seen the brother upset, he's always happy and smiling mashallah. Both of his wives seem happy with each other too.

Touching one in front of the other in a sexual manner is not only haram but show a lack of hayaa. This is clearly messed up and absolutely reprehensible.

 

[Desert Flower]

I think the selfish comment takes the cake. In many polygamous marriages i've seen, the wives rarely benefit due to the lack of wisdom and self-centered attitude of the husband.

The problem isn't polygamy, lets put that to the side. The real issue is that many men only seem to care about the privileges as qawamah of the family and never about the massive responsibilities that comes with it. They enter marriages only thinking about what the wife has to do for them, and never what they have to do for her. They think she has to make him happy, but never that he too has to make her happy.

If many men took their role as qawamah seriously, we would not be seeing broke men trying to marry a 2nd time. Men using their wife's wealth to marry. Men treating their 2nd as a side chick. 1st wives being sectioned because of shock ect. All of this happens time and time again and it makes you think, where is their essense of being protectors and providers?

Its always the broke ones. These men are committed to leaving a trail of single mothers and fatherless children. Uff caleyk. Protectors and providers, they are not.

 

[Desert Flower]

Touching one in front of the other in a sexual manner is not only haram but show a lack of hayaa. This is clearly messed up and absolutely reprehensible.

These fools don't know what they're talking about. Of course its haram. but with the rising consumptions, I am not surprised.

 

[so_wavey]

Touching one in front of the other in a sexual manner is not only haram but show a lack of hayaa. This is clearly messed up and absolutely reprehensible.

yes ofcourse its not good to that

 

[Rooble44]

Touching one in front of the other in a sexual manner is not only haram but show a lack of hayaa. This is clearly messed up.

But clearly it works for them, who are to judge? I mean I would've preferred not to have heard about it but if it's working for them, then in my honest opinion I think they should keep it up. And I don't think it's haraam, it's probably not advised but to go as far as saying it's haraam might be a bit of a stretch. Also the brother is a well studied brother in the deen and teaches Qur'an and hadith on weekends for free, so I can vouch for his knowledge of Deen and character.

Edit: I retract my comment about it not being haram, it is. Looks like I'm gonna have a long conversation with him after this lockdown.

 

[so_wavey]

These fools don't know what they're talking about. Of course its haram. but with the rising consumptions, I am not surprised.

dont include me in that i dont agree with that wives should have different houses or if you have a big house they need to haev their own rooms.

 

[Xaruun]

All the time I see the same shitty threads with the same shitty posts day in and day out. And no, I’m not going to make any interesting or high quality threads because I don’t know how to.

 

[Angelina]

These fools don't know what they're talking about. Of course its haram. but with the rising consumptions, I am not surprised.

I'm sickened by the fact that it seems that the worst of our men are often the ones who go into it with no regards to morality or the well being of their women and children.

Polygamy is something only the best of men should dabble in. Providers and protectors. Not broke, addicted scum.