Why do Halimos act like their life would end or its such a bad thing if their husband marries anther woman?

[Xaruun]

Women can be short-sighted by their overwhelming emotions, when your husband is married to another woman, you get breaks from him, get help with the children, have time for yourself, and apparently the slight jealousy can create a healthy competition and even spice up your sex life.

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He's a friend of a friend but I've been invited over to his house once and I see him around town sometimes with his wives, as well as seeing him in the mosque. I've never seen the brother upset, he's always happy and smiling mashallah. Both of his wives seem happy with each other too.

This is some next cuck fetish wtf

 

[Desert Flower]

I'm sickened by the fact that it seems that the worst of our men are often the ones who go into it with no regards to morality or the well being of their women and children.

Polygamy is something only the best of men should dabble in. Providers and protectors. Not broke, addicted scum.

Period. But ironically, those men you’ve mentioned understand the responsibilities that come with having a second wife and choose not to pursue it because of it. Laakin these xoolos want to marry Halimo when Ayan his first wife has three kids and she lives in housing with no air conditioning. It’s sad and pathetic.

 

[so_wavey]

I think the selfish comment takes the cake. In many polygamous marriages i've seen, the wives rarely benefit due to the lack of wisdom and self-centered attitude of the husband.

The problem isn't polygamy, lets put that to the side. The real issue is that many men only seem to care about the privileges as qawamah of the family and never about the massive responsibilities that comes with it. They enter marriages only thinking about what the wife has to do for them, and never what they have to do for her. They think she has to make him happy, but never that he too has to make her happy.

If many men took their role as qawamah seriously, we would not be seeing broke men trying to marry a 2nd time. Men using their wife's wealth to marry. Men treating their 2nd as a side chick. 1st wives being sectioned because of shock ect. All of this happens time and time again and it makes you think, where is their essense of being protectors and providers?

Are you saying all men who have more then wives are like this? Do you agree their are alot of men who treat their wives good and also have more then one wife?

Of course their will be guys who will misuse women but polygamy is such a beautiful thing which is in our deen

Funny thing is you sound like the type of halimo who wouldnt mind her husband sleeping around doing zina haram things as long as he doesnt marry anther one and make it halal subahnallah

 

[Revolutionary]

I'm sickened by the fact that it seems that the worst of our men are often the ones who go into it with no regards to morality or the well being of their women and children.

Polygamy is something only the best of men should dabble in. Providers and protectors. Not broke, addicted scum.

You really shouldn't take what some people on here say as an objective representation of who does what, a lot of men are able to provide for more than one spouse, and their women object, (even what he is doing is halal) therefore it is haram for the the wife to object to something that is islamically acceptable, the problem lies with the women and their jealously, plain and simple.

 

[Desert Flower]

Are you saying all men who have more then wives are like this? Do you agree their are alot of men who treat their wives good and also have more then one wife?

Of course their will be guys who will misuse women but polygamy is such a beautiful thing which is in our deen

Funny thing is you sound like the type of halimo who wouldnt mind her husband sleeping around doing zina haram things as long as he doesnt marry anther one and make it halal subahnallah

What’s with the assumptions? Acuthubillah what filth is this and where did @Angelina mention this. It’s clear that you and many others are not mature enough to handle these discussions with the sensitivity and care that they require.

Edit: BTW most of y’all are 2000s babies with peach fuzz so, don’t concern yourselves with these matters.

 

[Rooble44]

This is some next type of cuck fetish wtf

 

[so_wavey]

What’s with the assumptions? Acuthubillah what filth is this and where did @Angelina mention this. It’s clear that you and many others are not mature enough to handle these discussions with the sensitivity and care that they require.

be honest would you rather your husband sleep around do zina or marry a second wife?

The extent some halimos hate polygamy is crazy

If a man wants to marry a second wife and make it halal while also fulfilling the rights of the first one whats wrong its in the deen

 

[so_wavey]

You really shouldn't take what some people on here say as an objective representation of who does what, a lot of men are able to provide for more than one spouse, and their women object, (even what he is doing is halal) therefore it is haram for the the wife to object to something that is islamically acceptable, the problem lies with the women and their jealously, plain and simple.

bingo

 

[Angelina]

Are you saying all men who have more then wives are like this? Do you agree their are alot of men who treat their wives good and also have more then one wife?

Of course their will be guys who will misuse women but polygamy is such a beautiful thing which is in our deen

Funny thing is you sound like the type of halimo who wouldnt mind her husband sleeping around doing zina haram things as long as he doesnt marry anther one and make it halal subahnallah

I never said that there aren't decent men in polygamous marriages. But many of the ones I have seen in our community have been shambolic as it seems many who are like you enter it.

Why on earth would I be okay with my husband sleeping around? I've never understood the logic behind such a comment. Him sleeping around is ten times worse. So why would you say this? Low IQ comment.

 

[Desert Flower]

be honest would you rather your husband sleep around do zina or marry a second wife?

The extent some halimos hate polygamy is crazy

If a man wants to marry a second wife and make it halal while also fulfilling the rights of the first one whats wrong its in the deen

I’m done with this topic. You’ve already made it clear you have no intention on considering other perspectives regarding polygamy. Good day to you.

 

[so_wavey]

I never said that there aren't decent men in polygamous marriages. But many of the ones I have seen in our community have been shambolic as it seems many who are like you enter it.

Why on earth would I be okay with my husband sleeping around? I've never understood the logic behind such a comment. Him sleeping around is ten times worse. So why would you say this? Low IQ comment.

ok i get you then thats fair enough.

Well thats what a lot of girls say if they had to pick one they would pick him not marrying anther woman because "at least im the only one he married"

 

[Angelina]

You really shouldn't take what some people on here say as an objective representation of who does what, a lot of men are able to provide for more than one spouse, and their women object, (even what he is doing is halal) therefore it is haram for the the wife to object to something that is islamically acceptable, the problem lies with the women and their jealously, plain and simple.

No, Islamically a woman can put it in her marriage contract that she does not want to be in a polygamous marriage and therefore can leave.

You cannot shove polygamy down women's throat. Find one that is okay, get your money up, be fair and live your polygamous dream.

Khalaas.

 

[so_wavey]

No, Islamically a woman can put it in her marriage contract that she does not want to be in a polygamous marriage and therefore can leave.

You cannot shove polygamy down women's throat. Find one that is okay, get your money up, be fair and live your polygamous dream.

can a woman put in a contract that i shouldnt wear a thobe? can she also put in the contract that i dont do any other sunnah?

Any contact goes against what allah made allowed is not even valid anyway its batil

so even if he signs it it means nothing in sight of allah because allah allowed it and it went against allah

 

[so_wavey]

wow did angelina say "she could leave"

A woman does not have the power to divorce (talaaq) her husband; rather divorce is in the hand of the man, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “(The right of divorce) belongs to the one who takes hold of the calf [i.e., her husband].” Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah

 

[Angelina]

can a woman put in a contract that i shouldnt wear a thobe? can she also put in the contract that i dont do any other sunnah?

Any contact goes against what allah made allowed is not even valid anyway its batil

so even if he signs it it means nothing in sight of allah because allah allowed it and it went against allah

Please learn the deen. You are not a scholar, a person of knowledge, nor do you even speak Arabic. There are legitimate hadiths that talk about this and scholars have used the quraan and Sunnah to come to this conclusion.

No one can stop you, but she has the right to leave. Marry who you want, but she has the right to be in a monogamous marriage.

 

[so_wavey]

No, Islamically a woman can put it in her marriage contract that she does not want to be in a polygamous marriage and therefore can leave.

You cannot shove polygamy down women's throat. Find one that is okay, get your money up, be fair and live your polygamous dream.

Khalaas.

subahanllah be careful a man marrying a second wife is no grounds for woman asking for divorce

If a woman asks for divorce for wrong reason she wont smell the fragrance of jannah

 

[so_wavey]

Please learn the deen. You are not a scholar, a person of knowledge, nor do you even speak Arabic. There are legitimate hadiths that talk about this and scholars have used the quraan and Sunnah to come to this conclusion.

No one can stop you, but she has the right to leave. Marry who you want, but she has the right to be in a monogamous marriage.

take the haq and read this

Can she ask for a divorce if her husband takes a second wife? - Islam Question & Answer

islamqa.info

she cant ask for divorce because HE DID NOTHING WRONG

 

[Angelina]

wow did angelina say "she could leave"

A woman does not have the power to divorce (talaaq) her husband; rather divorce is in the hand of the man, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “(The right of divorce) belongs to the one who takes hold of the calf [i.e., her husband].” Classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh Ibn Maajah

Women can go through the khula process and if she puts it in her polygamy clause in her contract the marriage is annulled.

Firstly:

If the wife stipulates that her husband should not take another wife, this is a valid condition and he must adhere to it; if he does take another wife, she has the right to annul the marriage contract.

That is because of the report narrated by al-Bukhaari (2721) and Muslim (1418), that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The conditions that are most deserving to be fulfilled are those by means of which intimacy becomes permissible for you.”

If she stipulated that he should not take another wife, does he have to adhere to that? - Islam Question & Answer

www.google.com

You can argue with the scholars, since you think you know better.


Have a good day.

 

[Angelina]

take the haq and read this

Can she ask for a divorce if her husband takes a second wife? - Islam Question & Answer

islamqa.info

she cant ask for divorce because HE DID NOTHING WRONG

Right now, you're arguing for the sake of arguing. You used Islamqa, yet islamqa is very much of the opinion that a woman has every right to put it in her marriage contract and can leave if he breaks the contract.

Go argue with the scholars of Islamqa. Go on, write to them.

 

[so_wavey]

Women can go through the khula process and if she puts it in her polygamy clause in her contract the marriage is annulled.

Firstly:

If the wife stipulates that her husband should not take another wife, this is a valid condition and he must adhere to it; if he does take another wife, she has the right to annul the marriage contract.

That is because of the report narrated by al-Bukhaari (2721) and Muslim (1418), that the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “The conditions that are most deserving to be fulfilled are those by means of which intimacy becomes permissible for you.”

If she stipulated that he should not take another wife, does he have to adhere to that? - Islam Question & Answer

www.google.com

You can argue with the scholars, since you think you know better.


Have a good day.

Well whats the strongest opinion on that? if the contract is valid because from what quite alot of scholars say the contract is batil its not clear cut that its invalid so please learn the deen