Why do Halimos act like their life would end or its such a bad thing if their husband marries anther woman?

[IstarZ]

I think the selfish comment takes the cake. In many polygamous marriages i've seen, the wives rarely benefit due to the lack of wisdom and self-centered attitude of the husband.

The problem isn't polygamy, lets put that to the side. The real issue is that many men only seem to care about the privileges as qawamah of the family and never about the massive responsibilities that comes with it. They enter marriages only thinking about what the wife has to do for them, and never what they have to do for her. They think she has to make him happy, but never that he too has to make her happy.

If many men took their role as qawamah seriously, we would not be seeing broke men trying to marry a 2nd time. Men using their wife's wealth to marry. Men treating their 2nd as a side chick. 1st wives being sectioned because of shock ect. All of this happens time and time again and it makes you think, where is their essense of being protectors and providers?

It reeks of self-entitlement. Women are expected to be pliable, compromise and even give up their rights to please them. Bearing that in mind, these complaints of the ‘injustice’ against them because some women choose to be in a monogamous marriage sound rather hollow.

Look at the above comment, turning something pure and wholesome into something salacious. No woman should have to compete for her husband’s love and affection.

 

[Angelina]

Well whats the strongest opinion on that? if the contract is valid because from what quite alot of scholars say the contract is batil its not clear cut that its invalid so please learn the deen

You used Islamqa to justify your point, but now because Islamqa doesn't adhere to your opinion you now want to dismiss Islamqa?

Like I said, go argue with them. I take my knowledge from people of knowledge and most of the scholars I take my knowledge from agree with this view.

 

[Angelina]

Well whats the strongest opinion on that? if the contract is valid because from what quite alot of scholars say the contract is batil its not clear cut that its invalid so please learn the deen

So the scholars of Islamqa are lying? Do you think the hadith is weak? Do you know more than them?

Like I said. Go argue with them.

 

[so_wavey]

Right now, you're arguing for the sake of arguing. You used Islamqa, yet islamqa is very much of the opinion that a woman has every right to put it in her marriage contract and can leave if he breaks the contract.

Go argue with the scholars of Islamqa. Go on, write to them.

well i follow the opinion that the contract is not valid there are scholars who are of the opinion its not valid

 

[Angelina]

well i follow the opinion that the contract is not valid there are scholars who are of the opinion its not valid

Great, you're free to follow the scholars who think that.

But accept that many people follow the opinion that women can insert it in her contract. So therefore, leave women alone who do not want to be in polygamous marriages.

Good day.

 

[so_wavey]

You used Islamqa to justify your point, but now because Islamqa doesn't adhere to your opinion you now want to dismiss Islamqa?

Like I said, go argue with them. I take my knowledge from people of knowledge and most of the scholars I take my knowledge from agree with this view.

I got you LOL i was going along now i will finish you look here

Yes thats strong opinion you said and thats called giving up rights

Do you know also a husband can put in the contract that he does not want kids?

and she has to abide by it

its all about giving up rights

 

[Angelina]

I got you LOL i was going along now i will finish you look here

Yes thats strong opinion you said and thats called giving up rights

Do you know also a husband can put in the contract that he does not want kids?

and she has to abide by it

its all about giving up rights

How old are you?

Having children is one of the main aims of marriage. The same scholars that believe that a woman can put in her marriage contract she doesn't want to be in a polygamous marriage also argue that not having kids is not allowed.

According to some scholars

Polygamy=optional

Kids after marriage=not optional, unless the couple decide to only postphone it temporarily.

Clearly it isn't the same.

 

[so_wavey]

How old are you?

Having children is one of the main aims of marriage. The same scholars that believe that a woman can put in her marriage contract she doesn't want to be in a polygamous marriage also argue that not having kids is not allowed.

According to some scholars

Polygamy=optional

Kids after marriage=not optional, unless the couple decide to only postphone it temporarily.

Clearly it isn't the same.

yes but there also scholars who say that its valid condition

 

[so_wavey]

How old are you?

Having children is one of the main aims of marriage. The same scholars that believe that a woman can put in her marriage contract she doesn't want to be in a polygamous marriage also argue that not having kids is not allowed.

According to some scholars

Polygamy=optional

Kids after marriage=not optional, unless the couple decide to only postphone it temporarily.

Clearly it isn't the same.

so where is giving up rights going to end?

 

[Angelina]

so where is giving up rights going to end?

Polygamy=optional

Not having kids after marriage=not optional.

 

[مسافر]

I got you LOL i was going along now i will finish you look here

Yes thats strong opinion you said and thats called giving up rights

Do you know also a husband can put in the contract that he does not want kids?

and she has to abide by it

its all about giving up rights

If you change your perspective and see your wife as your ally and best friend, with valid emotions and opinions who wants you to succeed (because that means the family succeeds) I think your problem will be fixed.

 

[so_wavey]

Polygamy=optional

Not having kids after marriage=not optional.

its actually not optional its a sunnah

 

[Angelina]

its actually not optional its a sunnah

It is optional. You do not have to be in a polygamous marriage. Monogamy is also sunnah and it is optional for men as well.

Also, for polgamy if you do not have the time, money and overall ability to treat them fairly, it is haraam.

At this point, it is clear you argue for the sake of arguing. Leave me alone now.

 

[Mercury]

Touching one in front of the other in a sexual manner is not only haram but show a lack of hayaa. This is clearly messed up and absolutely reprehensible.

Also telling others about your sex life is a huge sin in islam

“Verily, the most evil of people in the presence of Allah on the Day of Resurrection is a man who was intimate with his wife and then spreads her secrets.”

 

[Mercury]

subahanllah be careful a man marrying a second wife is no grounds for woman asking for divorce

If a woman asks for divorce for wrong reason she wont smell the fragrance of jannah

if you marry a person who says their against polygamy and you go marry behind her back its a valid reason for divorce

 

[Xanibacal bin Barqa]

Women can be short-sighted by their overwhelming emotions, when your husband is married to another woman, you get breaks from him, get help with the children, have time for yourself, and apparently the slight jealousy can create a healthy competition and even spice up your sex life.

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He's a friend of a friend but I've been invited over to his house once and I see him around town sometimes with his wives, as well as seeing him in the mosque. I've never seen the brother upset, he's always happy and smiling mashallah. Both of his wives seem happy with each other too.

That's absolutely XARAAAAM, waryaa ,
tell your friend that , you can't be intimate with one in front of the other wives.

wtf , this is some o level shit

 

[Mercury]

Well whats the strongest opinion on that? if the contract is valid because from what quite alot of scholars say the contract is batil its not clear cut that its invalid so please learn the deen

what do those scholars say about Fatima RA the daughter of scw she had a condition with her marriage to Ali RA that he was to not marry another wife as long as she was alive this was a condition placed by the prophet scw himself

you need to learn the deen

 

[so_wavey]

what do those scholars say about Fatima RA the daughter of scw she had a condition with her marriage to Ali RA that he was to not marry another wife as long as she was alive this was a condition placed by the prophet scw himself

you need to learn the deen

No you speaking to someone who knows the deen

in that case Ali ra wanted to marry daughter of enemy of allah so prophet didnt want him to marry her for that reason

It was narrated from al-Miswar ibn Makhramah that ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib proposed marriage to the daughter of ABU JAHIL, when he was already married to Faatimah, the daughter of the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him).



Ibn at-Teen said:

The most correct way to interpret this story is that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) forbade ‘Ali to be married at the same time to his daughter and the daughter of Abu Jahl, because he gave as the reason for that the fact that this would hurt him, and hurting him is haraam according to consensus.


It would have been permissible for him if he had not been married to Faatimah; but being married to them at the same time, which would have been hurtful to the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) because Faatimah would have been hurt by it, meant that it was not permissible.

Quoted from him in Fath al-Baari, 9/328


DONT LIE ON THE DEEN

 

[Basra]

I mean why is it always the talk of if he marries anther woman thats it im done etc dont they know its a sunnah and a man can do it and its not haram?

I mean sometimes the poor guy is not even thinking of getting a second but because of the halimos obsession with it it messes up the guur

More girls need to be more accepting about it

Most guys dont tell their wife they getting anther wife because they will lose their mind and hurt their kids future

Well it kinda is the end of her sex life. That means she is not the "it" thing now. Next...

 

[Rooble44]

That's absolutely XARAAAAM, waryaa ,
tell your friend that , you can't be intimate with one in front of the other wives.

wtf , this is some o level shit

Find the edit on my second post.