Is it a good idea to marry someone who has already been married before with a child?

[Waaqmasho]

How did a discussion about marrying single mums turn to a discussion about the deen? . If a young man marries a much older woman with a kid, in most cases he is indeed beta. Special cases are if the woman is much richer than him and is the one providing. I believe providing for another man's child is what makes someone beta. If you're a single dad it doesn't count. Fresh young men are for fresh young women.

 

[Boogie]

Both of you guys are wrong, the first blames it on the woman and the second on the man, how are you going to argue against someone using the same reasoning? you people lack self awareness

U opened my eyes

 

[Angelina]

Both of you guys are wrong, the first blames it on the woman and the second on the man, how are you going to argue against someone using the same reasoning? you people lack self awareness

I never blamed it all on men. Learn to read.
My point was that if a woman did end up in an abusive relationships, how would she have predicted that?

The problem is that many people on this forum have a reading age of a 9 year old.

 

[Boogie]

I never blamed it all on men. Learn to read.
My point was that if a woman did end up in an abusive relationships, how would she have predicted that?

The problem is that many people on this forum have a reading age of a 9 year old.

Abusers show signs before marriage no way they can hide it for that long without a slip

 

[Angelina]

How did a discussion about marrying single mums turn to a discussion about the deen? . If a young man marries a much older woman with a kid, in most cases he is indeed beta. Special cases are if the woman is much richer than him and is the one providing. I believe providing for another man's child is what makes someone beta. If you're a single dad it doesn't count. Fresh young men are for fresh young women.

It is about the deen. If you call someone a beta for doing something the prophet s.a.w and other Sahabas did, you're calling them a beta as well.
You are free to not like it, but how are you insulting two consenting adults for marrying?

The fact that you cannot see it shows you either have low IQ or a degenerate.

 

[Boogie]

It is about the deen. If you call someone a beta for doing something the prophet s.a.w and other Sahabas did, you're calling them a beta as well.

The fact that you cannot see it shows you either have low IQ or a degenerate.

No need to insult both of u stop

 

[Revolutionary]

I never blamed it all on men. Learn to read.
My point was that if a woman did end up in an abusive relationships, how would she have predicted that?

The problem is that many people on this forum have a reading age of a 9 year old.

No need for revisionism, the man you quoted was talking about how the women that are divorced are toxic and the fault is on her, and you then talk about how you dont know if the men are deadbeats, insinuating that thats the reason why, not only was it wrong but also random

 

[Boogie]

 

[Angelina]

No need for revisionism, the man you quoted was talking about how the women that are divorced are toxic and the fault is on her, and you then talk about how you dont know if the men are deadbeats, insinuating that thats the reason why, not only was it wrong but also random

Look at the last line. He also said, if a woman ends up with a loser, its because she is probably a loser as well.

My whole point was how is a woman, especially a muslim woman who does not cohabit know if he will end up transgressing against her rights?

This is what I mean when I say many have a reading age of a 9 yr old. You're young so i don't mind and I think you're pretty intelligent. But many who are double your age have issues with basic comprehension.

 

[Boogie]

Look at the last line. He said, if a woman ends up with a loser, its because she is a loser as well.

My whole point was how is a woman, especially a muslim woman who does not cohabit know if he will end up transgressing against her rights?

This is what I mean when I say many have a reading age of a 9 yr old. You're young so i don't mind and I think you're pretty intelligent. But many who are double your age have issues with basic comprehension.

I will stop the fight
Men are men
Women are women
Stop bickering over nothing what does it benefit besides coming off as femcel/incel

 

[Boogie]

But of course no one will listen to me and start arguing again

 

[Waaqmasho]

@Angelina

The prophet's case is unique. Khadija was a special person and so was the prophet. So unless the wife someone is marrying is khadija and you're the prophet you're indeed a beta. Besides if we are talking about the deen the prophet explicitly mentioned that one shouldn't marry a widow but a virgin (preferably). Here's the hadith.

"Jabir b. 'Abdullah (Allah be pleased with them) reported: I married a woman during the lifetime of Allah's Messenger (may peace be. upon him). I met the Apostle of Allah (may peace be upon him), whereupon he said: Jabir, have you married? I said: Yes. He said: A virgin or one previously marrried? I said: With due previously married, whereupon he said: Why did you not marry a virgin with whom you could sport? "

فقد جاء في الحديث عن جابر بن عبد الله قوله: (قال لي رسولُ اللهِ صلَّى اللَّهُ علَيهِ وسلَّمَ أتزوَّجتَ قلتُ نعَم قال بِكرًا أم ثيِّبًا فقُلتُ ثيِّبًا قالَ أفلا بِكرٌ تلاعبُها وتلاعبُكَ)


Another hadith:
"It was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Marry the one who is fertile and loving, for I will be proud of your great number before the nations on the Day of Resurrection"

قول النبي ﷺ: «تزوجوا الوَدُودَ الولودَ فإني مكاثرٌ بكم الأمم يوم القيامة»

Another one:
عن عطاء عن النبي - صلى الله عليه وسلم - أنه قال: «عليكم بالأبكار، فإنهن أعذب أفواها وأنقى أرحاما»
Basic translation since i didn't find english version: Marry virgin girls because their talk is sweeter and their wombs are more fertile.

So Islamically the prophet s.a.w told men to marry a virgin who can give birth to a lot of children. it's preferable islamically unless someone has a special reason, if there isn't one i'm sad to say but he is a beta and should get himself a young wife. And we will call him what he is, and warn other young people to marry younger wives and not widows. You being angry and a single mum or wanting a young man for one of your single mums habaryars won't make him any less of a beta. Widows are a bigger problem and the marriage most of the time doesn't last that long. And it's not wise for a young man to get himself in that sort of trouble. If he does he is not really smart and a beta because he settled with a wife who married younger got kids from another man, divorced him and now he will take care of that man's kids he won't have a wife at her prime. He won't experience what it's like to be newly wed couple who never married before. He is a beta for settlign for that. A BETA!

 

[Waaqmasho]

So answering the question here. NO IT'S NOT A GOOOD IDEA to MARRY A WIDOW WITH A CHILD!!!! There isn't any good idea any way you look at it, and if you're a muslim islam tells you it's preferable to marry a virgin young wive. Even if islam was neutral about the subject, there are many disadvantages for marrying a widow which you can search up. Besides, you don't wanna be a beta now do you? Why settle for a wife with a kid? Go out there and get someone your age who has never married before who both of you can better connect to and understand. A wife is also a good friend, can you imagine having an old ass woman as your friend? The age gap would make things awkward and you couldn't be friends. Treat marriage the same way.

 

[reer]

So answering the question here. NO IT'S NOT A GOOOD IDEA to MARRY A WIDOW WITH A CHILD!!!! There isn't any good idea any way you look at it, and if you're a muslim islam tells you it's preferable to marry a virgin young wive. Even if islam was neutral about the subject, there are many disadvantages for marrying a widow which you can search up. Besides, you don't wanna be a beta now do you? Why settle for a wife with a kid? Go out there and get someone your age who has never married before who both of you can better connect to and understand. A wife is also a good friend, can you imagine having an old ass woman as your friend? The age gap would make things awkward and you couldn't be friends. Treat marriage the same way.

go ask a 40 year old widow if she would marry a young guy 15 years younger than her. shes most likely to say no. because age important weeye.

 

[Waaqmasho]

go ask a 40 year old widow if she would marry a young guy 15 years younger than her. shes most likely to say no. because age important weeye.

These girls want to normalize marrying widows, while we are trying to save faraxs a life of pain and misery.

 

[reer]

These girls want to normalize marrying widows, while we are trying to save faraxs a life of pain and misery.

this is why i like polygamy. its better inay guursadaan married men with kids and be 2nd 3rd or 4th wives.

 

[Waaqmasho]

this is why i like polygamy. its better inay guursadaan married men with kids and be 2nd 3rd or 4th wives.

Yep that's good. All i'm against is your first marriage being a widow while you're young, having them as 2nd 3rd wives is not a problem.

 

[Angelina]

@Angelina

The prophet's case is unique. Khadija was a special person and so was the prophet. So unless the wife someone is marrying is khadija and you're the prophet you're indeed a beta. Besides if we are talking about the deen the prophet explicitly mentioned that one shouldn't marry a widow but a virgin (preferably). Here's the hadith.

"Jabir b. 'Abdullah (Allah be pleased with them) reported: I married a woman during the lifetime of Allah's Messenger (may peace be. upon him). I met the Apostle of Allah (may peace be upon him), whereupon he said: Jabir, have you married? I said: Yes. He said: A virgin or one previously marrried? I said: With due previously married, whereupon he said: Why did you not marry a virgin with whom you could sport? "

فقد جاء في الحديث عن جابر بن عبد الله قوله: (قال لي رسولُ اللهِ صلَّى اللَّهُ علَيهِ وسلَّمَ أتزوَّجتَ قلتُ نعَم قال بِكرًا أم ثيِّبًا فقُلتُ ثيِّبًا قالَ أفلا بِكرٌ تلاعبُها وتلاعبُكَ)


Another hadith:
"It was narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Marry the one who is fertile and loving, for I will be proud of your great number before the nations on the Day of Resurrection"

قول النبي ﷺ: «تزوجوا الوَدُودَ الولودَ فإني مكاثرٌ بكم الأمم يوم القيامة»

Another one:
عن عطاء عن النبي - صلى الله عليه وسلم - أنه قال: «عليكم بالأبكار، فإنهن أعذب أفواها وأنقى أرحاما»
Basic translation since i didn't find english version: Marry virgin girls because their talk is sweeter and their wombs are more fertile.

So Islamically the prophet s.a.w told men to marry a virgin who can give birth to a lot of children. it's preferable islamically unless someone has a special reason, if there isn't one i'm sad to say but he is a beta and should get himself a young wife. And we will call him what he is, and warn other young people to marry younger wives and not widows. You being angry and a single mum or wanting a young man for one of your single mums habaryars won't make him any less of a beta. Widows are a bigger problem and the marriage most of the time doesn't last that long. And it's not wise for a young man to get himself in that sort of trouble. If he does he is not really smart and a beta because he settled with a wife who married younger got kids from another man, divorced him and now he will take care of that man's kids he won't have a wife at her prime. He won't experience what it's like to be newly wed couple who never married before. He is a beta for settlign for that. A BETA!

The prophet s.a.w and Khadijah wasn't a unique case as if you knew anything about the deen you would know thay ALL of his wives accept Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) were indeed widowed or divorced.

Furthermore, many of the sahabas would marry divorced or widowed women with no issues.

You've literally twisted the deen and said one shouldn't marry a widow. You're trying to make the halal, haraam. The prophet s.a.w questioned Jabir, he didn't say someone shouldn't marry a widow.
Also, the other bit in bold. You said you don't have the English translation, do you even speak Arabic?

Whilst marrying a virgin is preferable, you cannot act like marrying a divorced or widowed woman is a bad thing and calling men beta for doing something halal is indeed slanderous and despicable.

So, why lie about the deen?

 

[Username]

Hell no.

 

[reer]

Yep that's good. All i'm against is your first marriage being a widow while you're young, having them as 2nd 3rd wives is not a problem.

The prophet s.a.w and Khadijah wasn't a unique case as if you knew anything about the deen you would know thay ALL of his wives accept Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) were indeed widowed or divorced.

Furthermore, many of the sahabas would marry divorced or widowed women with no issues.

Whilst marry a virgin is preferable, you cannot act like marrying a divorced or widowed woman is a bad thing and calling men beta for doing something halal is indeed slanderous and despicable.

are you comparing a garoob with no kid to garoob with a kid? come on waa different kettle of fish. you just want dood for the sake of it